


Daybreak

by Galaxy_Collector



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, I know this isn't your normal marvel, I write evil, I'm a screenwriter, Infinity War broke me, Masturbation in Shower, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Shameless Smut, That's all I know how to do, Time Travel, Writer with hurt feelings, time travel fixes everything
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-20
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-07-14 13:57:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 26,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16041860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxy_Collector/pseuds/Galaxy_Collector
Summary: Willow Danvers has never had a problem letting her twin sister, Captain Marvel, save the day. Unfortunately, after Thanos comes and wipes out half of humanity she can't feign blissful ignorance any longer. What will she do, then, when she can't reach her sister or any of her friends? Will she be able to find a way to let people over the walls she's built to protect herself?





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, I know there's a whole series with Peggy in it that negates everything I wrote here. I do not care. Don't @ me, okay. Infinity War really hurt my feelings. Not because it was a bad movie. I just needed to fix it. So, I did. Also, I'm a screenwriter IRL, so if this seems especially evil on my part that's why. I get paid to make people feel things.

Willow came back into the living room with a new glass of wine clutched in her hand. She couldn't take her eyes off the screen as she watched her two favorite characters shoot daggers at each other.

"Oh my God," she groaned, "just kiss already."

She sat down slowly, almost falling off the edge of the couch because she wasn't paying attention. She squealed loudly when their lips finally touched and all the sexual tension from the first two seasons came pouring out. The clothes came off next and she grinned wide, feeling vindicated for believing these two would get together one day. A loud knock at the door pulled her out of the moment and she jostled her glass as she jumped up.

She squinted through the peephole before yelping loudly and jerking the door open. She pulled Pepper into a hug and over the threshold.

"What are you doing here?" she asked into the other woman's hair before pulling back.

"Tony," Pepper said flatly, her only reply.

"Yeah, that guy's the worst," she joked. Pepper didn't laugh. "Yikes."

She walked into the apartment fully, Happy dragging behind. Willow pulled him into a quick hug too before whispering, "What'd he do now?"

Happy just shrugged before shutting the door. He knew. He always knew, but he wasn't going to take this away from Pepper, who was already sitting on the couch with her head in her hands. She was somehow ignoring the moans coming from the TV as the characters Willow loved effectively ruined their strained friendship.

 _There's no going back now_ , she thought before turning it off.

When she switched it off, she turned her attention to Pepper, rubbing her back. She put the wine glass down on the coffee table in front of them and pulled her in for another hug.

Pepper wrapped her arms around Willow too and let out a gentle sob.

"What happened?" she asked again.

"He left," she said after a second. "Just walked right through a portal. Then he called and... and..." Willow waited patiently for Pepper to find the right words. "And then he called me from a spaceship or something."

"Like  _the_  spaceship?" Willow asked in awe.

She'd seen it on the news like everyone else. Another group of aliens coming to wreak havoc on a big city and, of course, Tony had been there. He was always in the middle of the chaos. She was used to him creating it, but now he was more mature. An adult. Which meant he was the one fixing the problems these days.

"Isn't it always?" Pepper said.

Willow snapped her mouth shut and pursed her lips. It  _was_  always like that with Tony. One of the many hazards of caring for him.

"He always comes back, though." Willow offered. "Doesn't he? I really don't think we're ever gonna get off that easy."

Pepper gave a watery laugh and sat back up. The tears had been silent, but had left streaks in her otherwise flawless makeup.

"I don't see how you've put up with him for this long," she admitted.

"Eh," Willow shrugged. "45 years isn't that long."

She gave another laugh, this one more genuine than the last, and Willow could see she could distract her. It was just going to take some work. Pepper had dealt with Tony for a long time too and that took its toll on you. Especially when that man was responsible for saving the world. A world that seemed to get in trouble more than stay out of it lately.

"You know what we should do?" Willow asked, clapping her hands together.

"Get drunk," Happy suggested.

"That," she answered with a smirk, "and we can play Avengers Monopoly."

"You have that?" Happy asked.

Pepper stared at her for a second. Willow was convinced she was going to tell her that was a stupid suggestion, but she just burst out laughing instead. Willow smiled and stood up to grab the game.

"You get the alcohol. I'll get the game," Happy corrected, shooing her to the kitchen.

She saluted him and he rolled his eyes before making his way down the hall. She loved how well they knew their way around. They were all so comfortable here and it was like welcoming roommates home every time they, or Tony, dropped by.

She put the wine bottle she'd been nursing all afternoon under her arm and grabbed another from the small fridge. She walked back to Happy who was already pulling the board and pieces out, but Pepper was nowhere to be found.

"Bathroom," he answered.

"I'm Thor," she said in response, which made Happy perk an eyebrow at her. "What? Don't act like you didn't know my type was tall and blonde, okay?"

"With one eye, apparently."

"What? Who hurt my baby?" she demanded.

Happy chuckled, "No idea. Tony said they got a transmission or something. He's with Loki. Maybe he did it."

"Loki would never."

"Sure," he said slowly.

"I'm just surprised he didn't tell me."

"Maybe he was afraid you wouldn't be not-so-secretly in love with him anymore."

"Not possible," she teased.

They gave Pepper the Iron Man piece without thinking and Willow started snickering when she saw the piece Happy had in his hand.

"What?"

"Spider-Man, huh?"

"I was just holding it. I didn't  _pick_  Spider-Man."

"Uh huh. Whatever you say, old man. I know you got a soft spot for the kid."

"I—no—listen..."

Willow stared at him, grinning wide, waiting for him to finish his thought.

"He's a good kid," he finally mumbled, slamming the piece down next to the other two.

"He is," she agreed quietly.

Willow topped off her glass and offered one to Happy, who refused. Like always.

"Come on," she pleaded. "You're not working."

"I'm always working."

She put his glass back, knowing he'd take it eventually, and they both fell into a comfortable silence as they waited for Pepper. Happy let his head hit the cushion behind him and his eyes slowly closed.

A loud crash shook the whole building, making them both shot straight up. They looked around for the source like it was in her apartment, which they knew couldn't be true.

They heard the screams next, coming from every direction. Willow's heart started to beat wildly uneven in her chest. Happy grabbed her hand and he pulled her toward the bathroom, where Pepper hadn't made a noise the whole time.

"Pepper," Happy called cautiously as they made their way. "You okay?"

"Pepper?" Willow spoke up. "Say something."

Happy gave her hand a gentle squeeze once as they stood in front of the bathroom door. He pushed it open slowly, finding nothing but a pile of ashes in her place. 


	2. T is for Trauma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from happylilprompts on Tumblr (via Pinterest)

Happy and Willow walked into the cavernous building, greeted only by more silence. The ride over had been marred by devastation and death... and silence. Neither of them had found the words to make it better. Nothing could.

Happy had ahold of Willow's hand as they turned a corner, heading straight for Tony's lab. All the lights were off. No one was here, but there also wasn't any little piles of ashes where people used to be either. There'd been enough of that to haunt Willow's dreams forever.

She sat down hard on the cold ground, not wanting to take another step. Tony wasn't here and she didn't need any more confirmation of that. Happy floated into her view, but she couldn't hear what he was saying. His mouth was moving, but nothing was coming out except for a dull buzzing noise. Her field of vision was blurring around the edges and closing in fast. Her throat felt tight. She couldn't make herself take a full, deep breath.

She laid down fully and let the cool tile take over all her senses as Happy rushed off somewhere. She didn't know what he was doing and she didn't care. She just tried to make her lungs work like they were supposed to.

She couldn't get it out of her head that Tony wasn't here. He should have been waiting for them, a serious look on his face, as he rattled off whatever ridiculous plan he'd come up with in the meantime. This wasn't right. She couldn't be alone like this.

Happy came back and put a damp, ice cold rag on the back of her neck and slid down the wall until he was sitting beside her. He pulled her hand back into his, like it was his lifeline as much as he was hers.

She realized, after an absurd amount of time she was sure, she could hear Happy breathing slowly next to her. She pushed herself up until she was sitting with her back to the wall too. There wasn't a part of her that didn't ache, including her heart. That was where the squeeze she felt all over seemed to originate.

"He's supposed to be here," she finally whispered.

Happy leaned over and put his head on her shoulder, but didn't talk.

Just as her own eyes started to close, exhaustion finally taking its toll, they popped back open again. It hit her so suddenly it almost knocked the wind out of her.

"I'm gonna call Carol."

Happy was awake too, "How? What? How?"

She riffled through the bag she couldn't remember bringing in with her and pulled out the only way she knew to contact her sister. She was Willow's last and final hope. She didn't know how far this particular issue reached, but it didn't seem to discriminate based on whether you belonged to Earth or not, from what little they  _did_  know.

The ancient and alien piece of technology felt heavy in her hand as she pushed several buttons at once. Then she heard it. The beeping was invading all her senses and it was getting louder. She let the communicator fall to her side as she followed it. Happy was walking beside her too, holding his hands over his ears. It was getting worse.

"What is that?" Happy called over the noise.

They walked through the maze that was Tony's office in search of it. The lights switched on as they made their way through. There was definitely more paperwork and strange contraptions than Willow remembered it having, but it'd been forever since she'd made her way out to see the Avengers on their home turf.

"There," Happy said, pointing at a computer screen.

It kept up, almost like a heartbeat. It was certainly the right rhythm; maybe a little fast. Willow sat down in his chair and pushed the space bar to wake it up.

"Ms. Danvers, it's nice to see you again," F.R.I.D.A.Y said loudly.

"You too, F.R.I.D.A.Y. Can you turn that down, please?"

"Yes, ma'am."

The beeping, and her voice, were now at a more manageable level.

"Would you like me to patch you through to Mr. Stark?" she continued.

"Mr. Stark?" Willow asked, disbelief coloring her words.

"Yes."

"He's alive?" Happy asked.

The scratchy noise of a damaged speaker system came to life around them next. It was just him breathing heavily, but she knew it was him. He was alive.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y, can he hear me?"

"Who is that? Who's there?" he yelled.

"Tony? Tony, it's me."

She was right next to the microphone, not that it changed anything. She just wanted to feel like she was close to him. She needed her best friend with her.

"Will?" he asked, giving a huge sigh of relief.

"You're okay," she said.

"Where are you?"

"Where are you?"

They asked each other at the same time and both gave an uneasy laugh.

"You first," he commanded.

"We're at headquarters."

"We? Pepper's with you? Oh, thank God."

"Umm, no. It's me and Happy."

"Oh," was all he said for a minute. "Do you know where she is?"

Willow took a deep breath and lied, "No. I tried to call. She didn't answer. But that doesn't mean anything. Okay? She's the head of a huge company. She's probably just bossing people around somewhere." He gave another uneasy chuckle. "Your turn."

"Uh, it's complicated."

"When is it not with you?" she teased.

"Very true."

They got quiet again and Willow hung her head as she waited for him to answer. She hated lying to anyone, but with Tony it seemed like the worst possible offense. They didn't do that with each other. He'd probably never forgive her, but she couldn't think about that right now. She just needed to get him home.

"I'm sorta on Titan."

"As in Saturn's moon?" she screeched.

"Umm, no."

"Damnit, Tony, I..."

"I know, Will. I know. I'm sorry."

"I'll figure it out."

"Will, I have no idea where I am. No ship. Kinda, sorta crashed the one I came in on..."

"I'll figure it out," she interrupted forcefully.

Tony didn't say anything else and worked on steadying himself. His heartbeat slowed, but not enough for Willow to be completely comfortable.

She looked back at Happy and shrugged her shoulders. She knew exactly what she needed to do and exactly what she was dreading. If Carol was alive, she could go and get Tony. It might take a while to figure out where he was, but it was better than nothing. If she wasn't... she shook her head to rid it of that thought. She couldn't get caught up in it.

She pulled up the communicator in front of her face again and pushed all the necessary buttons to call her sister. She slid down the wall again and dragged the microphone into her lap. And then she did the only thing she could do: wait. 


	3. Bee Stung Heart and Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from coffin-prompts on Tumblr (via Pinterest)

Willow jerked awake right before the part of her nightmare that always had Pepper slipping out of her grasp. She hated how detailed it was becoming. Every single time she couldn't be saved. Every single time it made Willow sick to her stomach.

She tried to shake herself awake fully, but couldn't quite manage. She saw Happy curled up beside her, sleeping peacefully. She didn't know how he was doing that, if it was true. His snores definitely made it sound true. She pulled the microphone back to her mouth from where it had fallen on the floor.

"Tony?"

Silence.

"Tony? You okay?"

Silence.

She looked over at the screen and saw his heart still beating softly, up and down on the monitor.

"I'm here," he said, his voice tired.

"Go back to sleep. Sorry."

" _You_  go back to sleep, butthead."

"Not a chance," she admitted.

Willow let her eyes close though, against her better judgment, still clutching the mic in her hands. It was her only link to Tony and she wasn't letting it go.

"Is Nebula still there?"

"I don't have anywhere to go, Ms. Danvers," her voice came through. 

She seemed just as tired as Tony.

"Just checking."

She wasn't sure how long it was that she sat there never truly asleep, but eventually Happy woke up and went in search of food. She picked at what he handed her, not paying attention to anything else but the monitor.

"Gimme," he commanded.

He held out his hand for the microphone and she jerked it out of his way. "I'm fine."

"Yeah, I see that. Humor me."

Willow carefully unfurled her fingers and she winced when they moved. It hurt to breathe anymore. Any movement felt weird, almost foreign.

Happy sat up and patted his shoulder for her to lay down, knowing she wasn't going to leave the lab. Before she closed her eyes, she watched the monitor and checked the time.

22 hours since she'd left Carol a message and received no answer. Tony could wait a little longer. She'd be there soon. She had to be.

__________________________

"Pepper still hasn't called back?" Tony asked suddenly, his voice getting raspier by the minute.

"No," Willow answered quietly.

They were now working on hour 36 and Tony was running out of food and water. The fact that he even had any should have made her laugh, but nothing about this was funny. Only he would think far enough ahead to put snacks in his suit.

Her brain was starting to realize something the rest of her wasn't willing to accept yet. It was becoming a real possibility she may have to listen to her friend die.

She wiped the tears that hadn't stopped falling for the last hour out of exhaustion. It was mostly quiet, but every now and then she would let out a whimper and Tony would moan, like it was hurting him to hear her in pain.

"Call her again."

"Of course," she conceded.

She knew she should stop, just tell him the truth, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. He was probably catching on, but there was no way she could bring herself to cause hurt him like that.

Every time they did get to hear her voice, they'd smile for a minute before letting the misery take back over. Those couple of seconds were all that was keeping them sane, but it wouldn't last much longer.

__________________________

1\. Up. Down. 2. Up. Down. 3. Up. Down.

She'd started counting his heartbeats and listening to him breathe somewhere around hour 42. She'd start over again when she forgot what number she was on, her other thoughts distracting her. She never made it past 90 or so. It gave her something to do and she felt like somehow she was keeping him alive. Not that it was even remotely real.

Hour 47. Tony was officially out of everything. It wasn't how she'd imagined any of this, not that she ever let her mind go there for too long. She'd lost people before, but it was always quick and painless. For the other person, at least. This was a horrible way to die. It wasn't fair. None of it was. He was alone, except for Nebula.

The speakers started to give a high-pitched whine, making Willow sit up straighter. It was almost like feedback, but it was different. Obnoxiously loud, but different.

"Tony," she screamed, "can you hear that?"

"Yeah," he shouted back. "I think..."

The noise got louder and louder until they couldn't hear the monitor beeping anymore. Happy and Willow covered their ears.

Then it stopped and Tony sounded like he was running. Willow wasn't even sure how that was possible right now. It had to be the adrenaline. She just prayed if he was running away from something he was fast enough to get away. They stared at the screen waiting for anything that might tell them what was happening.

"Ms. Danvers?" F.R.I.D.A.Y asked.

"Yeah?"

"It appears your sister has arrived on Titan."

Happy screamed and picked her up off her feet, twirling her around the room. She all but collapsed in his arms, the weight of all that had happened in the last two days melting away for a second.

"Oh my God," she rejoiced.

"Nope, just me," Carol teased.

Happy laughed and pulled the mic to his mouth, Willow still attached. "You have  _no_  idea how good it is to hear your voice."

"Hey, Happy. Hey, Will."

Willow's whole body tightened as it remembered the tension that had been crushing her for the last decade. She was relieved Tony would be alright and that her sister hadn't been swept up in whatever had happened, but she'd still left her all alone on this huge planet. The one person who was never supposed to do that to her had betrayed her. 

Willow shook her head furiously when Happy put it under her mouth. She crossed her arms over her chest, letting go of the microphone.

"So, uh, what's the GPS say? Be here at 10? Maybe 10:30?"

Carol laughed loudly and Willow found she was smiling at the sound without meaning to.

"Be there soon, Happy. I promise."

"Thank you, Carol," Happy said for Willow.

"You're welcome."

There was some jostling and they realized their part of the conversation was over. The other group was talking amongst themselves, but they couldn't tear themselves away from the sounds either.

"Is it just you guys?" Carol asked.

"Yeah, uh, just us," Nebula answered. "Now."

Willow could hear Carol adjusting different seat belts in whatever kind of ship she'd gotten. She seemed satisfied after a minute and a deep whirring noise took over. Willow reached over and turned down the volume.

"Hey, F.R.I.D.A.Y.?"

"Yes, Ms. Danvers?"

"We're going to take a nap. Scare the shit outta us with the alarm system or something if they get into any trouble."

She grabbed Happy's hand and lead him to the small living area right next to the lab.

"Yes, ma'am."

The lights dimmed and Happy pulled a blanket off the back of one of the couches to wrap them both up in. It wasn't long before that same awful nightmare was back.

__________________________

It felt like it hadn't been any real time and all the alarms were going off. She jumped straight up and looked around for the source, but her mind was still too foggy to make sense of it. Happy was right beside her and he didn't look he was faring much better.

"Ms. Danvers," F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, cutting the alarms off. "you asked to be alerted..."

"Yeah, sorry. What's going on?"

"Captain Rogers is approaching."

"Captain Rogers?"

"And several others," she tacked on.

Willow rushed over to the nearest monitor and F.R.I.D.A.Y. switched the view so she could see what was happening. It was definitely Steve, Thor, Bruce, and Nat. Her face fell when she didn't see anyone else with them.

She couldn't make her feet move, she was still basically asleep, so she waited impatiently for them to find her and Happy. Their voices were sending shockwaves to her heart. She'd assumed they were all gone too and even though she wished there was more of them to greet her, this was good enough for now. Tony would fix it.

"Oh my God," Rhodey screamed the minute he saw her, "Willow?"

She held out her arms as he tackled her back onto the nearest chair. She was more than a little thrilled to be wrapped up in him. He'd always been happy to be her Tony stand-in and today didn't seem to be any different. She let go of all she'd been holding onto and started to sob. Rhodey held her quietly as she got it all out, no one brave enough to ask any questions yet.

She sat back eventually and looked to the rest of the group, giving them an uncomfortable laugh. She hated looking weak in front of anyone, but these were her friends. Mostly. She stood up and walked over to Thor, who was holding out his arms for her.

She touched his face where a simple, leather patch was covering his eye. No one said a word, though. They just stared down at their hands as she gave Thor a hug and then moved back to her spot next to Rhodey.

"Umm," she started lamely. "Is anyone gonna tell me what the hell just happened?"

"Where's Pepper?" Rhodey asked, like it had hit him suddenly.

"She's—uh—she's...," Willow stuttered, getting choked up again.

"Tony?" Natasha asked.

"He's on his way," Happy interjected.

Everyone let out a breath they clearly didn't know they'd been holding. It was obvious Willow wasn't the only one who thought Tony was the answer to their prayers.

"You're the only ones here?" Steve asked, looking around.

Willow wasn't sure who he was hoping for, but it was just them. She just nodded, not sure how else to answer him. He leaned back further in his chair.

"Willow," she said, thrusting a hand forward to introduce herself properly.

"Steve," he replied, shaking her hand.

"You two haven't met before?" Thor finally spoke up.

"Nah. Team Iron Man," she said as an answer.

It just seemed to confuse him though. He hadn't been here for the fight, so that made sense.

"Best friends for life and all that," Bruce piped up.

"And all that," she repeated with a smile.

"Well, someone better start talkin'," Happy interrupted again. "Because the humans in the room would really like to know what's going on."

He pointed to himself and Willow, like they didn't already know who he was talking about. Now it was their turn to look uncomfortable. She knew exactly why too. They'd messed up. They were responsible for fixing the messes and they'd clearly made one. Or failed. Otherwise, they wouldn't all be in this position. Tony had failed too, but Willow had learned a long time ago she'd forgive him for anything. Right now, they just needed him back. They just needed to put it all back the way it was. That's all that mattered. 

 


	4. Ironically Alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from happylilprompts (via tumblr)

With everyone off taking a shower and getting the last couple of days off them, Willow was in the kitchen. It was the only thing she knew how to do in this situation. She hated the feeling of being useless, but that was just one of the many hazards of your best friends being superheroes. Granted, this particular feeling of inadequacy outdated Tony stepping into that suit. Being the astonishingly human twin sister of the fabulous and remarkable Captain Marvel brought out all kinds of feelings. It was horrible and she wasn't looking forward to that rearing its ugly head when Carol got there.

"Whatcha making?" Rhodey asked and she jumped. "Sorry, kid."

She giggled quietly. "It's okay. And I'm making your favorite."

She was still clutching her chest as he walked over and took the spoon out of the nearest pot. He groaned approvingly before pulling her in for another hug.

"You know," he said, "you don't look a day over 25. It's making me feel like a creepy old man for being this attracted to you."

She swatted his arm playfully. "I do not look 25, weirdo. But thank you for the strange compliment. I think."

"Yeah, ya do."

He leaned over the counter, picking at different things laid out buffet-style.

"You're gonna tell him about Pepper, right?"

"How do you know I didn't already?"

He got quiet and when she looked over at him he was giving her the usual 'who-you-lying-to' look. She hated how well he knew her. Sure, she'd known Tony the longest, but Rhodey knew her best. It'd been forever since their ill-fated relationship had crashed and burned in a glorious fashion, but it hadn't changed anything between them. He'd always be her first true love.

"I'll tell him," she finally said.

He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and went back to grazing as she finished up the meal. She leaned into it, finding that she was craving his touch. She didn't really like that about herself. She didn't want to need him like this.

Everyone streamed in slowly from their separate rooms, Bruce being the last to join. They all sat down on the barstools opposite Willow and ate quietly. They were in mourning, just like she was, and she knew how hard it was to pretend you were actually tasting anything you were eating. She appreciated that they were trying, though.

"I'm sorry," Thor offered first. "We didn't mean for this to happen."

"I know," Willow answered. "But I have to know what did happen. I don't understand what went on. One second I'm bitching about Tony being gone with Pepper and then half the world disappeared."

"We lost," Natasha said.

"We were up against Thanos," Bruce spoke next. "He... he had all the Infinity Stones and..."

Willow leaned forward and steadied herself on the counter. She knew what this meant now. Tony and Willow had had lengthy discussions about this possibility over the last couple of years. They weren't coming back. Any of them. They were gone to a place no one could rescue them from.

"Has anyone been in contact with Hill? Or Fury?" Happy asked.

"We haven't talked to anyone but you guys," Bruce continued.

Thor clapped him on the back in an attempt to be reassuring, but it just shook his whole body. Willow smiled at the interaction, but it faded quickly. She could feel someone staring at her as she tried to calm down, but she didn't feel like trying to see who it was. It didn't really matter anyway.

Then the surface she was holding onto started to shake. She pulled her hands back but it didn't stop. Then she noticed everything was shaking. Everyone was looking around for the source just as Willow was bolting out the nearest door. Happy wasn't far behind and she knew it would probably be a while before he ever really was. 

The large craft came into view as soon as it cleared the ominous clouds that had settled over headquarters. Happy gasped and Willow found she wasn't surprised at all. Leave it to Carol to come home in the most ridiculous spaceship she could find.

_Always has to make an entrance_ , she thought bitterly.

She crossed her arms over her chest and waited for the engine, or whatever it was, to come to a stop. The minute Tony's face appeared though, all of her anger vanished. She ran forward and jumped into his arms. They were just a pile of laughter as they got to hold each other. Every single moment she'd spent worrying about him was forgotten. He pushed her hair back to look in her face.

"God, Will. Calm down. I told you... I'm always okay."

"I wasn't worried," she lied, laughing again.

He threw an arm around her shoulder finally and steered her back in the direction of everyone else who was waiting for them. He kept putting a kiss on her temple every couple of steps like he couldn't believe he was here either.

The minute he was inside, he was manually removing his suit. The whole thing looked strange in pieces. He had a huge smile on his face as he looked around though. He was clearly taking a different approach to this than they were. He was seeing who was left, where she saw who was missing. Leave it to him to put it all in perspective.

Carol gave a well-placed cough to get Willow's attention and the good atmosphere was zapped out of the room. Willow rounded on her, eyes blazing.

"You wanna do this right now? In front of everyone,  _Captain Marvel_?" she hissed with disdain. "'Cause I'm pretty sure you don't want to be embarrassed like that."

Rhodey tried to move her back a couple of inches but she shrugged him off.

"What..."

"No," Willow interrupted, "you don't get to say shit to me. The time for saying anything is over. You had 10 years and now you get to be quiet."

Carol snapped her mouth closed and waited for Willow. "You left me. You  _left_  me. With Dad. You finally turned into something he could be proud of and then you leave me with him.  _He was unbearable_. And then he died and you missed that too."

"You literally just gave all the reasons I wouldn't be," Carol mumbled.

"I have been calling you," Willow continued, ignoring her completely. "Why did you chose now to answer?"

"Oh, I don't know," Carol replied sarcastically. "Half the damn universe disappeared. I thought it might be important."

"And it wasn't when my husband died?"

"Thomas..."

"Yes, Carol. He died and you weren't here."

"You had—had Tony and Rhodes," she said, trying to defend herself.

"I wanted my sister, Carol. I wanted you."

"Well, your sister was off saving the world, remember?"

"You did a piss poor job of it because everyone is gone," she screamed. "You were gone for nothing. You missed everything for nothing."

Carol and Willow were nose to nose just and just as Carol opened her mouth to reply, they could hear Tony walking through the rooms calling for Pepper. Both women deflated instantly and Rhodey put an arm around Willow's middle to steady her. Between the grief and exhaustion, it was a wonder she was standing at all. Having to tell Tony was going to be the worst of it.

"I'm here now," Carol whispered, obviously realizing what Tony wasn't ready to.

Willow grabbed her hand and squeezed lightly. She needed her, whether she was ready to admit that or not. She would need all her strength to crush her best friend, the man who had seen her through her worst.

"Tony," Willow called. "Can you come in here?"

"Be right there, Will."

She looked around the room and motioned for everyone to leave. Most did, but Rhodey stayed put beside her on the couch and Happy remained in the doorway. Carol even stayed, hovering just out of her line of sight. Willow knew how much guilt Happy was harboring with this and he felt like he should have to witness it too. He'd earned it, but she didn't agree.

"I can handle this, Happy."

"I'm not leaving."

She huffed quietly at his stubbornness as Tony made his way back to them.

"I know you said she wasn't answering, but I thought maybe she was here by now."

"Tony, I need to tell you something."

"Okay..."

"Pepper was with me," she blurted out.

"When?"

"When everyone disappeared," she answered quietly.

Tony looked around at their faces, waiting for someone to laugh at the joke. No one did though.

"You lied," he accused.

"Yes."

"Because you knew I wouldn't come home."

"Yes," she repeated.

"Did you really not see how useless I'd be without her? Why bring me back at all?"

"She would have killed me if I left you there," she said. "She'd kill both of us."

"She's not here now. Why care what she thinks?"

Willow bowed her head, not knowing what else to do for him. There really wasn't anything. She knew he'd be mad, definitely heartbroken, but this disappointment in his voice was worse somehow. It was just hurt.

"We'll figure this out," Bruce spoke up out of the wings.

Willow hadn't even noticed everyone had walked back in. The small living room, one of the many in this place, was bursting with too many people now. It was making her feel closed in, like she couldn't breathe again. She hated this and wanted it to just go away.

"Go check on Clint and Scott," Steve whispered somewhere behind her. "Tony let's go for a walk."

"I'm not going anywhere with you, asshole."

"I can handle myself," Willow said, turning to face him.

"He already hates me," Steve's only response.

Willow didn't watch as he filed out of the room. Steve went out behind him while everyone stood there with stunned looks on their faces. Willow wasn't the only one who didn't know what to do next and it wasn't comforting in the slightest. 

 


	5. The Void Screams Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from sarcastic--screaming on tumblr (via Pinterest)

Willow stared at Carol and Steve as they chatted together happily. They were joking and laughing and it felt weird. Not to be watching, necessarily. Just that it was happening at all. Everyone had gone back to their normal, whatever that was, and Willow had taken personal offense to it. Granted, her own ways of dealing with her grief had led her to Rhodey and it wasn't exactly healthy, but laughing felt out of line somehow.

_Everything felt wrong._

She got up from her chair and walked away. She had no idea where she was going, but she had to be doing something. Anything was better than watching all the supers being productive. Even Tony had been locked up in his lab for days, looking for a way out of their mess. Without the time stone, it was hard to see the end of this very long and dark tunnel.

She gave a small wave and a half-hearted smile to Rhodey as she passed him, but motioned for him not to follow either. She needed a minute alone.

Willow opened a random door off the main hallway and walked inside. She didn't even care if it was a garage at this point. It was quiet. That's all she really needed.

When she opened her eyes she was surrounded by art, which she was more than fine with. Leave it to Tony to have a random art gallery in the compound for no reason whatsoever. None of the photographs or paintings that lined the wall seemed not to follow any sort of theme. But with Tony, chaos was a theme and it was beautiful. Most of the time.

After a minute or two, she heard the door open on the other side of the room. She didn't stop to see who it was. She kept walking through different scenes, determined not to care about who had followed her. She wasn't in a mood to talk.

She felt Steve beside her before she looked, though. Of course it was him. Ever the peacemaker of the group. He'd made up with Carol, which Willow thought would never happen after his 'little lady' comment the day before. It was Steve and you couldn't be upset with America's Golden Boy. It went against God. Or the founding fathers, at the very least.

"What do you want?" she asked quietly.

"Nothing," he lied.

She walked further on, leaving him at the first painting.

"Do you want me to leave?"

"It's a free country, right? Thanks to you."

He chuckled humorlessly. Suddenly, she saw Carol at the other end of the gallery. They were boxing her in. She couldn't leave without talking. They were forcing her to deal with her issues. She had absolutely no desire. She could ignore them if she wanted. She would. Carol had to know that's where she was mentally, even being gone as long as she had. 

"You know," Steve started up again. "Hopper has a way of making even simple scenes appear unsettling."

He was referencing the painting in front of them both now and he recited it like every single art history teacher she'd ever had. She looked him over, wondering if he meant to be condescending. It was Steve, so probably not.

She looked back to the painting, one she'd seen a hundred times, and he was right in what he'd said. Maybe it was the fact that this was one of her favorites. Chop Suey always had been. Or maybe he had just assumed she wouldn't know about it. He wasn't malicious. It just rubbed her the wrong way. Every tiny thing was setting her off lately and before she could stop herself it fell past her lips.

"Have you heard of the term 'mansplaining'?"

"Umm, no. But I have a feeling you're going to 'womansplain' it to me."

She laughed louder than she had in a week. "I am."

He waited for her to talk again. "Basically, it's when a guy tells you something about a subject and assumes you don't know because you're a woman."

Carol laughed and tried to cover it up with a cough. Steve was tripping over his words now to make up for his mistake. Willow knew it wasn't intentional, but he couldn't change if he didn't know. And she felt like correcting someone right now. She wanted him to be wrong. She felt like making Captain America human for a second.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't—I wouldn't..."

"Calm down," she teased. "I know, it's just I kinda have a Masters of Fine Arts from Columbia so..."

"Right," he said, smiling down at her. "I didn't mean to 'mansplain'."

"It's okay, old man. I know for you women should probably still be in the kitchen or whatever."

He chuckled and shook his head before standing next to her as she kept on to the next photograph. He was quiet, never overwhelming, as they commented on one and then another. He let her take the lead each time.

Willow knew what they were doing in there and what they both wanted to talk about. And it wasn't paintings. She just wasn't going to open that box right now. She wasn't ready. She could deal with one thing at a time, and right now that was getting out of bed in the morning and appearing presentable. That's all she had the strength for. Without Pepper, without all of them, she couldn't be asked to do anything more. Which was why she knew Steve and Carol weren't being pushy.

Willow moved on and left Steve in front of another Jackson Pollock. When she came around the corner, she was met with the most impossibly gorgeous scenery. The orange and red clashed beautifully with the tranquil browns of the buildings that were on fire. She couldn't remember ever seeing it before. She could almost smell the singed cloth and straw of the thatched roof. 

No, wait, she could  _definitely_  smell it. Why could she smell it?

Willow looked around and saw that she was in the painting. Several people stood next to her. They were in awe of the atrocity happening in front of them. Some were crying. None were paying attention to her, if they could see her at all.

She closed her eyes tight and wished herself back to the compound and the art gallery where Steve and Carol were. She didn't know what else to do to get herself out of the oddly vivid daydream she'd found herself in. Her whole world was on its side, so it made sense that strange things would happen left and right.

_Right?_

"Willow?" Carol screeched. "Steve, I found her."

"Willow?" he asked, coming closer.

She was still too nervous to open her eyes. Then she heard the footfalls of the others running toward them. Had her dream been  _that_  real?

"She's here," Steve answered as more people came into the room.

She chanced it and opened her eyes, looking around to verify she was actually back where she should be.

"Where the hell did you go?" Tony asked, upset.

"I—I—wait, I left?"

"Yeah, babe. You left," Rhodey said.

He smoothed her long blonde hair out of her face from where it was sticking in places because of all the sweat. She didn't miss the way he used the pet name so easily either. He was staring straight into her eyes and she had no idea what he was seeing. Nothing seemed to scare him. That was good.

"I left?"

He just nodded and shooed everyone else away. Of course, Tony didn't leave. She was happy to see he wasn't too mad at her. He still cared about her on some level.

She wasn't ready for what happened next, though. Through the air, because nothing else made sense, a man appeared. He stepped through the golden rings that came out of his hands.

"Wong," Tony addressed him, like this was perfectly normal behavior. "I think Thor and Banner were just coming to check on you. Glad to see you didn't die."

"Who traveled?" Wong asked, looking around at everyone. "Was it you?"

He was pointing directly at Willow's chest. "Traveled?"

"Traveled through time," he clarified. "Without a time stone."

"What?" Everyone yelled at the same time.

"There's no way. I didn't travel through time. I just had a very intense daydream. It's..."

Wong was giving her a look that made it perfectly clear what he was trying to get her to understand. She needed to re-examine what had happened  **immediately**  and adjust. Willow couldn't time travel though. Only superheroes got to do the fun stuff.

"Do it again," Wong commanded.

"I can't," she retorted. "I don't know what I did.  _If_  I did anything."

"Try."

He was talking to her as if everyone else was staring right at them. She knew it shouldn't make her feel safe, to have him there, she didn't even know him. But something about the way he moved as he watched her seemed to relax every muscle she had. Like it was supposed to be this way.

She closed her eyes again, not sure where else to start. She hadn't closed her eyes the first time, but it seemed right. She could hear everyone around her talking in a hushed tone. They were frantic. They didn't believe it either. They couldn't and she didn't blame them. She didn't. She wanted one of them to tell her it was silly.

_Let the menfolk handle it, Will_ , she kept waiting for Tony to joke. And yet, her savior didn't come.

"I can't," she repeated, her eyes still closed.

"You need quiet," he said.

"I can't," she said again, trying to make him understand.

She couldn't do this, whatever it was they were asking of her. He needed to drop it and help find a way to get Pepper back instead of playing with this idea. If he could do all that with his hands, he could help more than she could.

"She time-traveled?" Tony asked.

"I believe so. The last time I felt energy that strong, well..."

"Well?" Steve asked.

"I was in the company of Dr. Strange, as he liked to be called."

This simple comment spurred something inside Tony as he rushed off, back to his lab. She sincerely hoped it wasn't because he expected her to save the day. That was the last thing Willow Danvers would ever be good for. 

 


	6. Error 404: Hero Not Found

"Again," Wong demanded.

Willow stared him down and screamed all the cuss words she knew, in her head. He smirked and she wondered how safe her mind was. Then she realized she didn't want to know. The not knowing was fun sometimes. Especially now. She desperately wished she could go back to a time when she didn't know this too.

She took a deep breath and held out her hand for Carol to take. They'd already agreed she would be Willow's anchor. Carol's time-traveling ability had been even more finicky than Willow's, so it was her job to make sure Willow could get home. They still hadn't completely made up, but they were better than before. They were talking. They'd hash it all out soon, but for now they were worried about getting everyone back where they belonged. For once, Willow was important to a mission. She still didn't know if she liked that or not yet.

With their fingertips barely touching, Willow let her mind go blank like Wong had been training her to do. She pulled out the image they'd been working on: her apartment in Chicago. She knew it better than anywhere else, so Wong decided this was the best place to start. She was getting good at conjuring up very specific parts of it, but she hadn't actually left since the other day with the painting. And that was by accident. Wong insisted that she could do it again. But as the hours turned to days, she was feeling less confident.

He'd also told her, in great detail, what she was capable of. She hated the pressure this "power" offered her. She found herself wishing a couple of times she could give it back and go back to blending in with the wallpaper, but she didn't really mean it. She liked helping. Loved even, maybe.

"Again," Wong repeated, but it sounded far away.

She opened her eyes slowly and realized what had happened. Willow jerked herself back to the compound without meaning to and saw Carol smiling over at her, hand still outstretched.

"That was very, very good, Willow. Would you like to try again? Or should we break for lunch?"

"Lunch at my place?" she joked.

"Sure," he answered.

Willow closed her eyes, more determined, and forced herself to appear in her dining room. Seconds after she got there, Wong appeared at her side through his portal. A small part of her was resentful of how easy he seemed to have it, but she never voiced that. She knew it wasn't really as effortless as he made it seem.

"I can only stay for a few moments. And I can't take anything with me. I'm strong, but not as strong as you." She nodded and looked around. "When is this?" he asked.

"Umm, last week. I'm about to get a call from Tony, but I don't hear it. 'Cause my phone is..."

Right on cue, Willow's cell phone started to vibrate on the marble countertop between them. She watched it wistfully before realizing she was alone. She made her way back to Carol again and saw Wong was already back.

"Can I touch things yet?"

"Do you think you can?"

"Yes?"

He chuckled, "Then be confident, Willow. Can you take things?"

"Yes," she said.

"Good. Do it." She gave him a funny look. "Take the cell phone. Bring it here. Put it back."

"What if I see myself?"

"You won't," he answered.

She liked that their training sessions were actually getting more intense, but she didn't enjoy the feeling afterward. She was drained and today would probably be the worst time yet. It was like her body was always playing catch-up for the hell she put it through.

Willow closed her eyes and materialized back in her apartment. She did what she was told with no difficulty. She showed Wong the phone and then went to put it back. Carol clapped lightly beside her and Willow giggled.

They were twins, sure, but her sister had always been on a different level. A pedestal, to be more accurate. She couldn't quite reach her, but now it felt more even. Not totally the same, but not so off balance either.

They did break for lunch finally and ate in Tony's lab, which was becoming their ritual. He wanted to know all about it, but had been banned from training from the beginning. He was just too much of a distraction for Willow, which was to be expected.

Wong spoke is almost imperceptible tones, but she could make out some of the words and her name was in their conversation.

"What is it?" she asked, cutting off Carol.

Tony and Wong turned around and Tony bit his lip. It was something he always did when he was afraid to tell her something because she'd be mad at him. She hated when he did that.

"We were discussing some of the things that may be hard for you," Wong answered truthfully.

"Which are?"

"I'm not sure what the repercussions are for bringing Ms. Potts forward in time."

"And the others?"

"If you don't arrive in time, or even a second too late, you would have to watch Pepper die."

"I can't..."

"I'm not as strong as you, Willow," he continued. "Or even Dr. Strange. I can see some of the outcomes, but not all. Steven could sift through them in seconds. It takes me much longer. I don't know what will happen and that makes me uncomfortable."

"It makes you uncomfortable?" she asked, indignant. "How long would it take you?"

"To test all the outcome and find the best ones? Maybe 6 months or so."

That was out of the question. Tony would die of starvation or exhaustion or something equally horrible before then. She didn't want to watch Pepper die. She really, really didn't, but she didn't see a whole lot of choice here either. She needed to hurry. For both their sakes.

"I'll  _try_ ," she said, emphasizing the 'try'. She didn't want Tony getting his hopes up, but she was afraid it was too late.

"We will work on it tomorrow morning. If you're up for it," Wong answered.

Willow nodded her head and her heart started to speed up at the thought that she could see Pepper as early as tomorrow. She could be home that soon. She needed her back, so she wasn't complaining. She just wondered how she was supposed to tell her best friend that they'd just lived the past week without them. Was it even something she could be honest with Pepper about? She sure knew that Tony couldn't tell her the truth.

"Clint and Nat are almost back," Steve said, poking his head into the room.

Everyone filed out and went to stand in their normal positions around the room. They all knew what they were about to see. Someone as overwhelmed by grief and sorrow as they'd been. She didn't want that feeling to be multiplied in such a condensed area.

They could hear baby Nathaniel prattling on and it put a smile on her face. It wasn't anything more than babbling, but it meant that this awful thing hadn't touched him yet. They might all know that his mom, brother, and sister were gone, but he was still okay. He wasn't torn and raw like the rest of them. He was going to be a welcome addition to their new home. A salve to the open wound that was this place and these people.

"Hey, guys," Clint said, his voice gravelly.

"Hey," they all offered.

Natasha had Nathaniel propped up on her hip as they came around the corner. Willow was the first to hold out her hands to take him and Nat gave him up easily. Headquarters was going to need a few more babies. She already felt better. Her own little Prozac. She refused to think about anything except his chubby cheeks and making him laugh. She didn't want to think about what tomorrow might bring.

* * *

 

"I can do this," Willow lied to Tony.

She didn't believe herself and she knew he probably didn't either. He couldn't let himself with what was at stake. It would be too hard if they were wrong. Or worse yet, if Pepper got here only to disappear in front of them all instead. Most scenarios were unspeakable, so they didn't.

"I know," he lied too.

He put a soft kiss on her temple and passed her off to Rhodey, who did the same, before they let her head with Wong to the art gallery. That small space had become her totem in some ways, and that's where she felt she should try her first real trip from. It's where it'd all started and that's where she felt the strongest.

She'd gone over and over in her head as to where she needed to land and at what time. As far as saving people went, Pepper would be the easiest. She knew that apartment better than any other place she might visit soon. Emotionally, well...

She held out her hand for Carol's and closed her eyes. She waited for the sensation of being jerked around to come and it did, stronger than all the other times before. It was a like a rope was attached to her waist and was pulling her back.

She came out of her own personal wormhole in the hallway of her apartment, right where she'd meant to. She was off to a good start. She could hear Happy discussing the game pieces. She smiled at the memory and it faded quickly, like it always did lately.

Willow tiptoed to the bathroom and knocked lightly. She could hear Pepper washing her hands, so she was still there. The water hadn't been on when she and Happy had come to check on her later. She knocked again.

"I'm coming," Pepper called.

Willow's breath caught in her throat. She was really here. It was only a second later that she jerked the door open and gave Willow a puzzled look and looked her up and down. Uh oh, she hadn't thought about what she was wearing that day. Of course Pepper would notice that.

"I need you to come with me."

"Come with you? To the living room?"

She was waiting for Willow to laugh or tease her. Pepper thought she was joking. They needed to get gone, though. They couldn't stay here much longer if Willow had any hope of actually saving her.

Willow grabbed Pepper's hand and, without thinking, forced herself to be pulled forward to where she'd come from.

She was gasping for air as they popped back into existence into Pepper's future. For her, this was only mildly confusing. Her brain was still trying to catch up. She could only imagine the state of Pepper's mind.

"Where are we?"

"Avengers Headquarters," Willow gulped between words.

This was so much worse. Every single part of her hurt. Every muscle, every tendon, was on fire. She couldn't take her eyes off Pepper as she looked around, though. Willow was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

When she managed to hold herself upright, she turned back to Pepper. "Ready?"

Pepper didn't answer, but followed behind Willow quietly. She trusted Willow. There was no way she would be able to travel through time with someone, even her best friend, without asking a thousand questions. Willow was, honestly, in awe of her.

As soon as they broke the tree line, Pepper doubled over in pain. Here it was. The worst. Willow was gasping and sputtering again as she leaned over her friend. She wrapped her arms around Pepper and waited for her friend to disappear.

It felt like an eternity before she pulled back, realizing she was still here.

"What are you doing?" Pepper asked, sitting on the ground.

Willow sat back on her heels and looked at her in disbelief. She was still here. If that was it, they'd be fine. Sure, she wanted to peel off her own skin it hurt so bad, but that was fine. She would learn to deal with that aspect. It was worth it.

"Do you wanna, uh, go inside?" Pepper asked cautiously, pointing to the large building.

Willow nodded and helped her to her feet. It wasn't long before everyone figured out where they were. Wong had to of told them. He was more in tune with Willow when she was gone. It was usually annoying, for someone to know her so well, but for now it was beyond amazing she didn't have to talk.

"I am so, so, so mad at you," she said to Tony as soon as they were wrapped up in each other again.

"I know, Pep. I'm mad at me too."

"I'll never forgive you," she said.

"Yeah, solid game plan," he laughed, tears streaming down his face.

"You okay?" Steve whispered to Willow as everyone walked ahead of them.

"Yeah, great."

She was still about to cry because of the pain, but she wasn't going to be able to wipe the smile off her face either. Especially because this meant she could save everyone. It was time to get to work.


	7. Testing for Gravity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from Pinterest (tell me if it's you so I can give credit)

"Shuri, can you hear me?" Tony asked.

They all waited. "Yeah."

Everyone was stationed around a huge conference table that had seemingly materialized out of nowhere in the middle of the compound. The minute Willow had come back with Pepper, Tony had been going a hundred miles an hour. He only ever stopped if she forced him too, but even that was pretty rare.

"Thor?" Tony called again, staring down at the phone in the middle of the table.

"Yes. I'm here, Tony."

Pepper was sitting in his lap, where she was most of the time. Tony never let her leave. If she was on the phone, she was next to Tony. If she was talking to someone, she was in his lap. The only time she was allowed out of his sight was to go to the bathroom. Even showering meant Tony was going to either be in there with her or talking to her through the curtain. Usually, he was in there with her. And Willow didn't blame either of them.

She was more surprised by Pepper and how okay with it she seemed. She wasn't one for PDA, most of the time. This was different and everyone knew it, but they were taking bets on how long it'd be before she got irritated with it and put her foot down. Willow had 2 weeks. Steve thought today was the day.

"Alright, well," Tony started. "I nominate T'Challa as the next one Willow saves. All in favor?"

"Agreed," Steve spoke up next. "He needs to bring his people back together. I think he should be next."

Tony and Steve had formed an uneasy and slightly unhealthy alliance since Thanos, but Willow forgot how strained their relationship was until they agreed on something. It didn't happen often, but they always looked so uncomfortable about it. If they weren't talking about her traveling through time to save their dead friends, she might think it was funny.

"Shuri, you okay with that?" Tony asked.

"Don't worry," she said, clearly crying. "I didn't move into his bedroom or anything yet."

She was joking around, but it was clear she was relieved. It was the same feeling Willow had herself.

"Then who is next?" Thor said.

They were still out looking for Scott Lang, who'd proven the most difficult to track down. They were starting to fear the worst, but neither Bruce or Thor wanted to give up and accept that reality.

"Umm, what about Bucky?" Pepper asked.

"Hilarious, babe."

"Why is that funny?" Steve asked. "He doesn't deserve to be here?"

He was indignant and Willow didn't like this side of him. If she was being honest with herself, he even came off as a little pompous. She'd heard the stories and knew why they were angry with one another. They all knew the stories. It was just hard to watch sometimes.

"Deserve?" Tony started back up. "Don't get me started on what he deserves, Cap."

"Stop," Pepper said quietly, but forcefully. "That's enough."

"All in favor of Bucky?" Rhodey asked, interrupting their feud.

Willow smiled over at him and raised her hand. The only person who didn't agree with Bucky's placement on their list was Tony, but he was overruled.

"Who's next?"

"Vision and Wanda?"

"Sure."

Willow stood up and walked back to her room. She didn't need to be there for this part. They were the delegates and, for once, she was in charge of the actual saving. She could break any ties if need be, but she could stay out of most of it and she planned to.

She could feel Rhodey behind her and she kept facing forward, not even slowing down to let him catch up.

"Don't wanna play politician, Rhodey?" she called.

"Nah."

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"As long as it isn't Top Gun again, fine."

"An Officer and a Gentlemen?" she teased.

He groaned and rolled his eyes, making her laugh. They took a left and made their way through the maze that was her room. it was the one of the biggest in the whole place, besides Tony and Pepper's room. She didn't have to leave her little sanctuary if she didn't want to. Outside of not having a kitchen, it was a pretty self-sufficient little area.

She fell flat on her bed before rolling to her side and inviting Rhodey to lay next to her. He grabbed the remote on his way down and pulled her to his side. She didn't protest, but it wasn't as fun as it usually was. Flirting with Rhodey was one of her favorite pastimes, but after their little grief sex it wasn't the same.

"Put it away," Tony yelled down the hall. "We're coming in."

Willow laughed and Rhodey just scoffed a they walked in. "We don't do it with the door open. You know I don't share."

Willow felt the blush creep up her neck quickly and tried to make it go away by thinking about anything else. Tony didn't see, thankfully, because he would be unbearable if he knew they still had sex occasionally. He'd be asking how long until the wedding every single day and neither of them needed that. Him and all his pressure had been a big reason for their fights and eventual breakup. Again, not something they would ever tell him.

"Okoye and Shuri are on their way here. Okoye was with T'Challa when he...," he gulped. "So, you guys can figure out the best time to, ya know."

"Go back in time and save him," Willow finished.

"Yeah, that."

Pepper and Tony plopped down on Willow's other side, making them move over on the huge bed. She forced her eyes closed, knowing that she needed to sleep if she had any hope of making this next trip. When she finally did let her dreams take over they were full of Tony and Pepper talking about nonsense and Rhodey asking her to marry him. How her life had gotten weirder than her dreams she'd never know.

* * *

Willow could see a trend starting as she stared down at a dozen or so large pictures of the Wakandan expanse. It was gorgeous, there was no denying it, but when she would appear it would be marred by death. There would be no time for beauty.

Shuri, Okoye, and Willow had spent the better part of a week going over and over every tiny detail. She wasn't the only who was nervous either. She'd never been to Wakanda, which meant this trip could go really bad. And finding a time when T'Challa had been alone and not actively fighting Thanos was proving almost futile.

Willow heard someone walk in, but she didn't turn to see who it was. She couldn't' take her eyes off the research in front of her. She wanted it burned in her memory.

"I will miss you, Willow Danvers," Shuri said quietly behind has she bent over the table.

"I'll miss you too, Shuri. But you miss your brother more. I get it."

"Yes, I do," she said truthfully. "But I will miss your stubbornness most of all."

Willow laughed. "Gee, thanks."

"In times like these, it is a good thing."

"It doesn't feel that way," she grumbled.

She came to sit next to Willow in one of the chairs not weighed down by books and random documents about Wakandan history.

"I've come to get you out of here," Shuri whispered conspiratorially. "Tony seems to think you'll go crazy if you spend another minute in here."

"He's probably right," she answered off-handedly.

"Come on," she said, pulling her away.

"I don't think I'll ever be ready," Willow admitted after they'd been walking for a second.

"Why is that?"

"I don't know this place. I don't know your home. I'm just... worried."

"You should be. This is scary."

"Thanks for the pep talk, Shuri," she joked.

"You do not need to be perfect, Willow. You just need to try."

"And what if I can't save him?"

"Then I will learn to live my life without him. I will move on."

"You shouldn't have to."

"None of us should  _have_  to. But I have people who are left that are counting on me if I cannot bring my brother home. We all know that is a very real possibility. One we're prepared to accept."

"I hope you don't have to."

"As do I."

"Will you forgive me?"

"Excuse me?"

"If I can't save him. I know right in the beginning you'll probably hate me, but after a while maybe?"

"I could never hate you, Willow."

They walked in silence for another second. "I'll try. Tomorrow."

"Alright, well, in that case let's go eat some of that horribly greasy American food if I'm leaving soon."

Willow rolled her eyes at Shuri's confidence in her abilities. "It's not that bad."

"Whatever you say."

* * *

Willow walked slowly back to the compound, now coming into view. She was still way off in her landing, still always showing back up somewhere in the trees. She was just happy to be in the same state at this point. T'Challa was right beside her and already cracking jokes about her abilities. Clearly the shock of what had just happened was wearing off nicely.

She tried her best to cover up her injuries as everyone rushed out to greet them. She concentrated on not limping, but it wasn't working. She stayed put until Okoye and Shuri tackled T'Challa so that everyone was paying attention to that and not her. Willow smiled at the group, now talking as fast as they could.

"How'd it go?" Steve whispered.

She winced at him as she tried to smile. She'd give her report later. Right now she wanted a hot shower to get the death off her. Pepper had been a walk in the park compared to what she'd just seen. She understood now how they could lose when just a couple of hours ago it seemed absurd.

If Steve noticed she was hurting, he was smart enough not to say anything. He was on one side, Rhodey on the other, as they walked back inside. Pepper and Tony were whispering to each other in front of them with Carol and Clint behind the group.

"Will, you need to lie down," Carol commanded. "Rhodey."

Rhodey nodded. "I can make it to my bedroom. I don't need a babysitter."

"That's not exactly what I had in mind," Rhodey answered suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows.

She laughed, shaking her head at his antics. Man, they might be doomed in the whole relationship department, but he knew how to make her laugh. He was her lifeline and had always been. She didn't know another way without him.


	8. Running on Spite & Fury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from happylilprompts on Tumblr (via Pinterest)

Willow pretended to be jostled when Steve sat down on her bed and he laughed. "Wow. I'm not  _that_  fat."

She scoffed. "Please. You don't have an ounce of fat on you."

That just made him laugh harder. "What are we listening to today?"

It'd been a week and a half since T'Challa, Shuri, and Okoye had gone home and the same amount of time she'd been hanging out with Steve exclusively. Bucky was next and that meant more research, but with Steve it didn't feel like it. They usually just spent their time listening to music he'd missed out on in the 80s and 90s and she was having way too much with introducing him to the more corny side of music and movies.

She was also learning about Bucky more and more every day. Willow loved mostly the way Steve changed when he talked about his friend and hearing about all the things they got into growing up. It was easy to get lost in the idea of Captain America and forget that Steve was still in there. She knew that better than anyone, so it was nice to get to know the man behind all that too. 

"What about some George Michael?" Willow suggested.

Steve nodded and kicked his shoes off as he laid down fully on her bed, putting his hands behind his head to get comfy. He closed his eyes as the first song started and Willow burrowed into his side.

She liked hanging out with Steve more than anyone else. Granted, it was part of her job, but the pressure was off to make it romantic. There was something that just wasn't right about that when she gave herself a chance to linger on it. He was her friend, sometimes her protector, but certainly not a romantic anything.

"Bucky would like this one," he said after a minute, making Willow smile again. "He wouldn't admit it, but he would."

"What was his favorite song before?" she asked quietly.

"Before the war, you mean?"

"Yeah."

Steve got quiet again. Lost in his thoughts. At first, she thought maybe he was having a hard time remembering. Then she realized she'd hit a nerve. Hopefully, he wasn't mad.

"Umm," he said, clearing his throat finally. "Probably _From the Bottom of My Heart_. Sinatra."

"Why?"

"Hmm, I don't know. Didn't ask. But he liked dancing real close. He'd do this thing where he'd put his hand right on the small of a woman's back so he could control the movement. The sway. I always told myself I'd do that too. Ya know, whenever I got around to dancing."

"He's coming back," she whispered again.

"I know."

They got quiet again and listened intently to the words bopping through the room. She wanted to bring him up again. She liked talking about him. Or rather, she liked Steve talking about him.

"Do you think we could try tomorrow maybe? Or even Friday?"

"Yeah. Friday sounds fine."

She loathed the idea of a deadline with their friendship. It was forced, but she let herself believe sometimes it wasn't.

"I'll do the letter tonight," he offered.

"I can do it."

"I think I should. I don't think anyone less would convince me," he joked. She smiled.

"Okay, you write it."

* * *

 Steve squeezed her hand one more time and let her walk over to the art gallery with Wong. No one waited for her in it anymore after she left. She never came back to the same place. As soon as she disappeared, they'd start looking out windows and at cameras, waiting for her to reappear again. Her landing was still way off, but she was glad Carol was enough of an anchor to help her find her way back to the general area of home.

"This one will be difficult," Wong said when they were alone again.

"What? Why?"

_Also_ , she thought,  _why are you just now telling me this?_

"You will be meeting Steve, you can't change that. He must listen to you, though. You'll need to spend more time there. Just... be careful, Willow."

"Yeah, yeah. Of course."

"Willow...," he started to plead.

"I will. I have Steve's letter. It'll be okay. I can handle this."

"Thanos himself will be there."

"He was last time too."

"He was gone by the time you got there. He will be there. You'll be in the middle of it. Be careful."

"Don't tell them."

He didn't need any direction to know what she was talking about. He wasn't allowed to tell her friends that this was getting harder and harder physically.

"I wish you'd let me."

"They'd make me stop," she admitted. "If they knew."

"If they knew it was hurting you? Yes, they would."

"Do you think I should stop? Do you think they can survive without the people they lost? Because I don't."

"That isn't going to be your problem if you join them," he retorted.

She stared him down before giving the argument up. She needed to get this over with and then they could fight about it. She repeated the steps in her head as she closed her eyes.

_Get Bucky. Give Steve the letter. Look for Sam. Come home. Get Bucky. Give Steve the..._

She could hear people surrounding her. They were screaming. This was different. Wong had been right. She'd never tell him that. The hardest part for her now would be to not get involved when everyone was getting hurt.

She opened her eyes to see Thanos a couple hundred yards away, fighting two people at once. He was terrifying and she found she couldn't move. No one could see her outside of Steve and Bucky and she knew this and, yet, here she stood paralyzed by fear.

She could feel someone staring a hole in the side of her head. She knew she  _should_  move. When she turned, she saw him for the first time. He was exactly as she'd imagined except that he was harder around the edges. He looked transfixed as he walked toward her.

She held out her hand for him and he took it without saying a word. As soon as they touched, he smiled. She did the same. They stood there for a second as the world fell down around them.

"Bucky?" Steve yelled, yanking Willow out of her daze. "Who are you?"

She fumbled in her pocket for the letter and handed it to him with trembling hands. She never let go of Bucky as she sprinted in Sam's general direction, or where she hoped he'd be. She gave herself a split second to contemplate what to do next before she did it.

"Don't tell me you saw me," she screamed over her shoulder at Steve, Bucky in tow.

He kept up with her just fine, shielding her from several bullets that weren't intentionally pointed toward them. They were just in the way. They weren't supposed to be here, she reminded herself.

All she cared about right now was getting Sam without Thanos seeing her. If he caught wind of what they were up to, or what she was up to, he'd put a stop to it immediately and in the most gruesome way he could think of.

She ducked behind a tree and waited for Sam to come close. Willow had no idea if she could do what she was thinking of, but she didn't give herself a chance to second guess it as Sam fell right next to her. She grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled them all out of there.

She collapsed on the ground as soon as they came into view of the compound. She was getting better about getting closer, but that was all she had to celebrate. A couple more trips and she might even make it inside.

She was shaking from head to toe as she attempted to steady herself. Neither her heart rate or her breathing were slowing down.

"Are you okay?" Bucky asked quietly next to her.

The voice was gruffer than Steve's and it made her jump a little. He put his hands up in surrender as she got a grip on her surroundings. The fuzzy edges getting sharper and sharper. 

"Sam?" she yelled suddenly. "Sam?"

"Here," he grunted. "I'm here."

She let out a breath and relaxed a fraction of an inch. Bucky sat down beside her since she didn't seem in the mood to answer him.

Willow laid her head on his shoulder and waited for Sam to find them. Bucky laced their fingers together and she didn't object to his touch. It was helping her calm down somehow. She didn't need to know how it was working.

"What the hell was that?" Sam asked somewhere behind them.

"Give her a minute," Bucky yelled back.

"But that was crazy and did we just..."

She felt Bucky move underneath her, but she didn't turn to see what he did to quiet Sam.

"Oh my God," Pepper exclaimed before yelling back to the door. "They're here."

She held out a hand for Willow to take and helped each of them move out of the heavy brush. They pulled Willow out first and Steve made sure to check her over once before handing her off to Tony. When everyone got over the initial shock that there were 3 people, instead of 2 they'd been waiting for, they headed back inside.

Bucky stood right beside her, holding his hands out in case she fell. "You can't tell them," she hissed.

She pushed away from him before giving him a chance to reply. Steve was waiting, just out of earshot, as he held the door open for everyone. He pulled Bucky into a bone-crushing hug as soon as he was close enough, letting Willow slip away from the crowd.

"So, do I get to know what just happened?" Bucky asked loudly.

Steve chuckled and Willow listened to the sound for a second. It was different. He was different with Bucky. Thanks to her.

She faked her best smile to Rhodey before brushing him off too and continuing to her room. No one else was paying her any attention, except Wong, who was watching way too closely. 

She basically hobbled the rest of the way, clutching the wall for support in some parts. For a second, she thought she might not make it at all, but she somehow managed.

She face planted into the mattress before groaning loudly into one of her pillows. When she managed to roll over, she thought she should just stay where she was for the night. Get some rest.

But the grime of the battlefield was caked on every inch of her exposed skin and she wanted it off. It felt like death was still surrounding her and she hated it.

She stood up slowly and swayed for a second before righting the world and heading to her closet. She attempted to take off her shirt, but only managed to get it about halfway before giving up. It just hurt too much to lift her arms that high. Was it really worth it? Could she get away with showering with her clothes on?

She heard someone clear their throat behind her and she jumped again. She hated the effect Bucky had on her in the two seconds since he'd shown up.

"Need some help?"

"I, uh, no. I'm fine."

He motioned for her to turn around, not believing her lies. She obeyed without thinking. Not that it was mean or a strict order or anything, but it had been an order she'd followed without question. She wasn't sure she wanted to be around him much longer.

He took off her shirt with ease and flung it somewhere in the closet before heading back to the door. A quiet whimper escaped her lips as she moved slowly toward the bathroom.

Bucky turned around for a second to check on her before standing in the doorway, blocking anyone's view that might walk by as she stripped the rest of the way down with difficulty.

She got the shower over quickly and pulled on the t-shirt and sweatpants that had just appeared on the counter. She smiled at the gesture before walking back to her room, her wet hair still dripping down her back.

He didn't say a word as he pulled back the covers and patted the bed for her to get in. Again, she didn't respond except to do what he said, or rather gestured. Her eyes closed the second her head hit the pillow and was basically asleep by the time Bucky pulled the sheets up to her chin. She could feel him sitting close by, and apparently that's all she needed to drift off into nothingness. She'd deal with this trip in the morning. 


	9. Alone With You

Bucky listened closely to her breathing to make sure she was really asleep. He wasn't even sure why he was still in her room, but he wasn't moving until she wouldn't notice he'd left. He could worry about what it meant later.

When he felt like she wouldn't wake up, he moved carefully off the bed and out of the room. He had promised not to tell, and yet that's exactly what he was about to do. She hadn't said it out loud, but she trusted him. He could tell.

Their... whatever it is, was literally hours old and he knew he couldn't let anything happen to her. In the short amount of time he'd been back with Steve, he had found out some key bits of information. The most important being that Tony could help him with Willow. He'd taken those very short opportunities to tell Bucky he was to go nowhere near her and he hadn't listened, but that meant Tony would know how to handle this. He'd know how to handle Willow. They'd been friends the longest, outside of her sister, which he'd literally met in passing. Tony could get through to Willow.

"Hey," Bucky said quietly, coming into Tony's lab.

He figured it would be better to meet him on his turf, instead of somewhere neutral. If Tony was anything like his father, Howard, it was better to give a Stark the illusion of being in charge. He knew that better than most.

Pepper turned around and gave him a small wave before looking back at Tony. Bucky knew he'd heard him. He just wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of paying attention.

"It's about Willow," he blurted out.

Now Steve was in the room behind him. He was never intentionally overbearing, but he just  _was_  sometimes. He still treated Bucky like a bomb that could go off any second. Granted, he'd never seen anything different out of him since they'd found each other again, but he could talk to Tony without losing it. He hoped.

"She's hurting," he continued.

Tony still wasn't looking his way or even acknowledging that Bucky was in the room... or talking. Pepper hit him in the arm and he gave her a look before going back to whatever he was working on.

"That's enough," she said. "Turn around. It's about Willow."

"He doesn't get to talk to me about her," Tony answered loudly. "He doesn't even know her. Just because he's got some weird attachment issues in the two seconds it took to save him, doesn't give him the right to talk to me about her. End of story."

"Stop. Right now. Or I'm walking out of this room and you can sleep on one of the million couches in this place."

He sighed dramatically before making a show of turning around to face Bucky. He didn't want to be away from Pepper, even if that meant playing nice with his nemesis for a few seconds.

"What is it?"

"I went to check in on Willow," Bucky started.

"A completely inappropriate thing to do since she's a grown woman."

Pepper rolled her eye sat Tony's childish behavior.

"I had to. You weren't there. And she needed someone..."

Tony pushed off his desk and was in Bucky's face in no time. "What the fuck do you know about her? You've said, what, 5 words to her. You don't _know_ her. I know her. I would  _know_  if she was hurting, okay?"

"If that were true," Bucky said, choosing his words carefully. "I wouldn't be in here right now."

Tony cocked his fist, but it was caught by Steve's hand in midair. Bucky really wished he wouldn't have stepped in this time. They both had a lot of pent-up aggression toward one another. It was going to come out eventually. Tonight was as good a time as any.

Pepper came up behind Tony and pushed at his chest until he backed away to his corner. Bucky had said all he came to say, so he huffed in Tony's general direction before walking back out of the lab. God, Tony was more like his old man than he cared to admit. Just as frustrating once they got something in their heads. It was a wonder Steve had put up with Stark for as long as he had.

He trudged back to Willow's room, the day's events catching up with him. Steve caught him with his hand on the knob. "Whatcha doin', Buck?"

"Going to bed. I've had kind of a big day," he tried to joke. "Ya know, getting brought back from the dead and everything."

Steve chuckled humorlessly. "Yeah, yeah. But that's Willow's room."

"I know."

"Okay," he answered slowly. "Well, let's go find you a room. Say, on the other end of the compound from Tony?"

"I'm fine here."

He wasn't sure why he was picking a fight with Steve over this. Or anything. Tony was right. They'd said maybe 5 words to each other. He had no claim. Certainly not one that warranted him slipping back into her room and falling asleep in the nearest chair. And, yet, he was still here.

Steve put his hands in his pockets and nodded once before turning on his heel and walking back down the hall. He wanted to be next to Willow. That's as far ahead as he was letting his mind go. He wanted to make sure she was alright. He couldn't very well do that from another room.

He shrugged his shoulders to no one and slipped in through the barely cracked door, making sure not to let too much light in. They'd all deal with whatever this meant tomorrow. Right now, he was going to sit next to her bed.

* * *

The first thing Willow heard when she woke up the next morning, the sunlight streaming through the blinds, was someone snoring lightly nearby. She laid her head to the side and saw Bucky sprawled out across a chair he had no business being in. It was entirely too small for his much larger frame, but then again when she'd picked it out she hadn't imagined he, or anyone else, would be in it. She smiled at the sight anyway, pushing herself into a sitting position. She stretched her arms as wide as they'd go, flexing each muscle individually to test them all out. It was still pretty painful, but she was sure she could make it to the bathroom alone.

She tiptoed across the carpet, which wasn't necessary at all with how plush it was. She just didn't want to disturb him. He looked so peaceful. She had to fight the urge to curl up next to him. Her eyes grew wide at the thought, making her shake her head. What the hell was that? She did not know this man.

Willow turned on the shower and slipped out of her clothes again. The fact that she could get them off without too much fuss was a good thing, but she needed the hot water to loosen up what was left of her injuries.

She took her time, savoring the feeling. She didn't want to, but 30 minutes later she was wrapping herself up in a towel. She looked around the bathroom and realized she'd forgotten to bring clothes in with her. She peeked around the door and noticed her room was empty. She found herself pouting for a second, though, but she was happy to have skipped that awkward morning conversation.

She walked to her closet and stopped short when she noticed a cup of hot coffee sitting on her mantle. She smiled as she saw the steam billowing off it and bent over to smell it. It was perfect. Just like she liked it, which meant someone had probably gone out to ask. She knew that someone was Bucky and she grinned at the idea of him in the kitchen, talking to Steve, to determine just the right amount of sugar.

God, she really needed to stop thinking about him like that. Or at all. She really needed to stop thinking about Bucky Barnes and focus back on her mission. The mission. That's what she was here for.

"Willow?" he called, pulling her out of her thoughts. "Mr. Wong wants to know how much longer. He wants to talk to you about something."

"Be right there," she squeaked.

She heard him shuffle away quickly. She was seconds away from inviting him in and she was glad he was already gone. Maybe he realized that too and rushed off not to embarrass her when he'd inevitably turn her down. Maybe she was crazy and looking too deep into this and she just needed to get dressed. 

Yeah, definitely the second thing.

When she came out of her room, she started toward the voices discussing something loudly in the conference area. She was toweling off her dripping hair as she stood next to Tony, who was gesturing wildly. He was mad about something. She tried to catch Pepper's eye, but he she was ignoring her. Oh, this couldn't be good.

"Hey," Tony finally addressed her, breathing heavily. "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

"Sure."

They broke away from the crowd, but only a few feet, before he started in on her. "Why didn't you tell me this hurt you? I mean, Barnes comes to me last night and tells me you're in pain and I didn't know. Wong even know. What the hell are you keeping secrets from me for? We don't do that, Will. That's the agreement. We don't lie to each other and we don't hide."

"I know," her only answer. "I know. I just... didn't want you to tell me to stop."

"I can't let you keep doing this."

"Let me, huh? Yeah,  _that's_  not how this works either."

"Will, you can't—"

"I absolutely can," she interrupted him. "You're not responsible for what happens to me, Tony. And I can do this. It hurts, yes, but that isn't your problem."

"Isn't my problem that my best friend is in so much pain that Bucky fucking Barnes has to help you take your shirt off, huh? Yeah, that sounds like my problem. Sounds like everyone's problem."

"And why is that?"

"Willow, you aren't going on another trip until we can figure out how to stop this."

He was being firm and it was cute that he was trying to save her from herself, but it hadn't worked this way in all the time they'd known each other and it wasn't going to happen this time either. She hadn't been able to keep him out of his suits and he wasn't going to be able to stop her from killing herself while she saved everyone else. That's not how they operated. Either of them. He couldn't expect her to turn away when he wouldn't.

"I know what this had done to you," she continued. "Not just with Pepper either. Peter's death. You don't realize it, but you mumble his name a lot. Tony, I'm getting as many people back as possible."

"Well, let the record show that I am morally opposed to this."

"Fine," she teased. "I am going to be okay, though. Promise."

"We don't make promises we can't keep," he reminded her.

"I'm not."

He laughed and wrapped her up in a hug before letting her go and looking straight into her eyes. "Be careful. Or I'll kill ya."

"Yes, sir," she saluted.

"Dork."

"Yep," she winked. "Now, can I go, Dad? Or am I grounded?"

"Grounded. Definitely." 


	10. Willow and the Fortress of Trust Issues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from happylilprompts on Tumblr

Willow let her head hit the back of the couch as she sighed deeply. She'd spent the last two days trying to figure out where Vision and Wanda had disappeared to before they'd joined the fight and was coming up empty.

Everyone had come to the conclusion they were together. Like, together together. Which made part of the conversation easier, but it didn't really help Willow right now. They still had no idea where they were. Getting Vision and Wanda out during the fight, like Bucky and Sam, wasn't an option because either since there was no way to do it without Thanos catching on. All in all, the frustration was setting in quickly. 

"Your hair is so soft after you wash it," Bucky said suddenly, playing with different strands.

He was trying to get her out of her head, something he was pretty damn good at. Better than even her late husband had been.

"You guys are disgusting," Natasha complained as she watched them.

Bucky just smiled and stuck out his tongue as he laid his head on Willow's shoulder and nuzzled into the crook of her neck. He didn't know what this was doing to her, or he did and he didn't care. Either way, Willow was the one sitting here trying to pretend like it wasn't affecting her. All she really wanted to do, though, was kiss a line down his neck and chest and force him to deal with what he'd done.

Nat made gagging noises before she walked off. The minute she was out of his sight, Nathaniel started to whine from his bassinet. Willow didn't hesitate in running over to pick him up. This little man was usually in someone's arms lately and he was getting spoiled. It didn't stop them. They'd just all come to the conclusion that he was just going to be spoiled.

She brought him back to the couch, where Bucky was now pretending to be completely engrossed in the show in front of him. They'd turned it on for background noise hours ago, so she knew he didn't even know what it was. She hated it for him, how uncomfortable he was around the baby. He wasn't known for being gentle, she got that, but she also didn't want him to run away every single time a baby showed up. 

"Hold him for a second," she said suddenly, passing Nathaniel off. "I'm gonna go get a diaper."

"I—uh, can't."

"James," she commanded. "Hold the baby."

"What if I hurt him?" he whispered.

"You won't," she said, leaving him alone to head for Clint's room.

When she got there, Clint was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. He didn't even see her there at first and she slowed down before going to sit beside him. Clearly, Clint needed her more than his son did right now. Bucky could hold it together for a couple more minutes. Clint had been her friend for years now and he needed someone to talk to. 

"Hey," she said, reaching out to rub his back. "How's it going?"

"Is Nathaniel okay?"

"Yep."

There was a longer pause than she was used to with Clint before he blurted out, "I can't do this."

"Do what?"

"Raise a person," he admitted.

"Yes, you can. You are. And you've already done it, remember?"

"No, I actually didn't. Laura did it all. I was always gone doing some other shit."

"Clint, you  _are_  handling this."

"What if I'm not?"

"Well, we're going to get Laura back, and the kids, and then she can help. But, honestly, babe, you're doing fine. And we're all here."

"I don't—uh—don't want them back."

Willow's mouth fell open. "What? Why not?"

"It's gonna kill you. And I won't be responsible for that. I can't be that selfish."

Ah, he was lying. He was lying to himself to try to save her. 

"You be as selfish as you need to be. I'm fine."

"Just like me, huh?"

He got her there. She wasn't fine. She was hurt. And so was he. They were both in too much emotional pain most days to see straight. Unfortunately, for her it was more dangerous, but she couldn't change that. She had to get back everyone before her body gave out on her. She knew Tony, too. He'd do everything in his power to save her. She just needed to give him time.

"If you don't want me to try and save them, I won't. It's up to you. It's your family. But I can. And I want to."

"Maybe after everyone else," he said finally. "My family is only important to me. The rest of those guys are important to everyone."

"Everyone is important to me."

"Want me to come in there with you guys?" he asked after a minute of uncomfortable silence.

"No. We got it. Why don't you get something to eat?"

"Yeah, sure. Eat."

She knew it was going to take Nat making sure he ate and showered and did all those normal human things for a while, but she was up for it. They'd been friends longer than he'd known Willow. She could handle this and Clint would be okay. Eventually. Or not really okay, as much as he'd make room for all the pain and learn to live with its existence. 

She left as quietly as she came, not wanting to disrupt him too much. He needed some time to process what had happened to him, even if it wasn't set to last very long. And he couldn't really do that with someone hovering all the time.

Willow passed Nat in the hallway, carrying a sandwich, and she smiled at her lovingly. Of course she'd known what he needed without him saying a word. She knew that feeling. She had it with Tony.

She made her way back to the living room and heard Nathaniel's giggles before she came around the corner. Bucky was tossing him lightly in the air and catching him, making him laugh harder than Willow had ever heard. Bucky was enjoying himself too.

Steve stopped behind her as she watched, "Wow. It's been a while since I've seen that."

"What?"

"Him smile. Good job."

"I didn't do anything."

"Sure," he winked, continuing to the office.

Willow sat down on the couch next to them and held out her hands. Nathaniel didn't reach for her like he usually did and she pretended to be hurt. Bucky grinned wide and let him snuggle deeper into his chest. She was so screwed and she didn't even know why. They hadn't even been around each other very long, but every minute was another minute getting more comfortable with each other. None of it made any sense. She'd never been all that comfortable with physical contact and now there was a person she willingly let lay on her. 

She was just happy to see it wasn't all in her head. He felt it too, even if neither of them wanted to discuss it. It was there. She liked it too much, in fact, and wasn't looking forward to the time when everyone went back to their lives. Because his wouldn't involve her once this mess was over.

"When are you leaving?" he asked suddenly.

Willow didn't miss the sad tone in his voice. "I don't know. Maybe tonight."

"Tonight? Why tonight?"

"Calm down. It's okay. I just... I'm not getting anywhere. I need to go and talk to them. Figure out how to handle this."

"Stay," he begged.

He had one hand wrapped around Nathaniel's tiny body as he drifted off to sleep and the other was on top of hers. She looked down at it and back to him. This was bad. They couldn't let this happen.

"We can't do this," she said out loud.

He didn't move his hand, "Why not?"

She didn't have a real answer for him. She just didn't like the feeling. Like there was something to lose again.

"Do you want me to leave you alone?"

"No," she said.

"Then just don't leave tonight, please. Wait. Until tomorrow or next week, maybe."

"Fine," she said, pretending to whine.

She wanted to stop, but she didn't try all that hard as she laid her head on his other shoulder. She closed her eyes and let on tear slip out as she let herself dream up a life they could never have. 


	11. Embrace for Impact

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from Pinterest (If it's you, let me know so I can credit)

Willow and Carol were staring down each other from across the room. They hadn't meant to get into another fight about the last 10 years, but here they were. Doing exactly that.

"I can't fix it," Carol complained. "I don't understand what you want me to do."

"Well, _sis_ , sorry isn't cuttin' it anymore. You left me here alone."

"You had Tony," she said for the millionth time. "And Rhodey. And Pepper. And Thomas."

"You are missing the point entirely."

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so, _so_ sorry. I didn't want to leave you," she exclaimed. "I really and truly didn't. And I missed you so much. You're my sister. My twin sister. I love you more than anyone else. Always will. But I had to leave. You  _know_  this." 

"I'm so sick of the I-had-to-save-the-universe excuse. You supers always use that when you leave the humans. Something is always wrong, Carol. I mean, when did you plan on coming back exactly? 80 years or so? What would have happened if I was dead? If I had disappeared in this crap? Tony would be dead, for one thing..." 

Carol pinched the bridge of her nose. "I was already on my way back when it happened."

"Liar."

"Believe what you want, but I was."

"Okay, fine. I just--"

"Ladies," Tony said, interrupting their feud. "Sorry. We, uh, found them." 

"Good," Willow answered, walking out behind Tony. 

Carol didn't immediately follow, but when she did she made sure to keep her face as calm as possible. She had her head in the game and Willow was grateful she knew when to pack away their issues for a little while. It wasn't like they wouldn't get back to them eventually.

She peered over Tony's shoulder as he sat back down at his computer, feeling slightly stalker-ish as she watched the grainy surveillance tape. It'd worked though. She didn't have time to care how they'd gotten there.

"Ready?" Tony asked. 

She swallowed hard and Bucky squeezed her hand. "Yeah, of course."

She'd spent too much time between missions and it had given her permission to get nervous. She'd had time to think about what awaited her when she got back. Pain. Lots of it. And she didn't want to repeat it, but Tony and Wong were looking into a way to save her from that. No progress still. This was just a recon mission, though. She could handle that.

"Stick the landing this time," Sam teased. 

She stuck out her tongue at him and then bolted straight for the gallery, her solace. Where all her missions began. Her good luck charm.

Carol still walked her back, playfully swatting her arm as they made their way down. Willow was trying to concentrate and she knew that, and here she was teasing her like they were 8 years old all over again. She couldn't help but smile. Which, she knew, was the point.

"Okay, kid. Be careful. See ya in a bit."

"Thanks."

"For?"

"Being here this time."

She wasn't trying to rehash anything. She was just being genuine and didn't know how much time she had left to tell her sister things like that. Or to tell her anything.

"I don't wanna be anywhere else," Carol said, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "Now, go kick some ass."

She laughed and shook her head before closing her eyes and letting time pull her backward. It was faster, easier, than the other times. Going home wouldn't be fun, but she pushed that thought out of her head as she headed to the café from the video.

She went straight for it when she appeared in the past, ordered a pastry, and sat down waiting for them to appear. She hadn't thought far enough ahead to bring a watch with the current time, so she had to resort to looking like a lunatic as she waited.

She nearly choked on her coffee when Vision seemed to pop out of the sidewalk very close to where she was sitting.

"Vis," she waved. 

"Ms. Danvers?" he asked concerned. "What--what are you doing here? Is Mr. Stark all right?"

"Yeah, yeah. Well, no," she corrected. "Can we talk for a second? I'm in a hurry."

"Sure. Let me make a call."

"Tell Wanda to just meet us down here too. It's about both of you."

Vision pulled the phone away from his ear slowly, thoroughly confused as to how she could possibly have that piece of information. She knew they weren't necessarily hiding their relationship, but they liked their privacy. She appreciated that, but right now it didn't matter.

"You look good, Vision," she commented as she sat down at her table. "I haven't seen you so..."

"Human?" he finished for her, a smile on his face.

"Exactly. It suits you."

"Thank you."

"Do you want me to wait for Wanda or can I just blurt it all out?"

"Ah, yes. Please, go ahead."

She took a deep breath and began. "I'm from the future. What's about to happen is just... awful. I've saved a couple of people and I don't know how to save either of you. So, I figured I could come here and you could help me. I need your help."

"Alright," he said, trying his best to digest this information. "I'm... not sure that I want to know what happens."

"Okay, well, I don't know how to save you. That's the part I need help with."

"What if we can't be saved?"

"Not possible. Everyone can be saved."

"Vis?" Wanda called. "Is everything all right?"

She looked over at Willow finally and smiled wide before pulling her in for a hug. "What you doing here? Is Tony okay?"

She laughed quietly at how similar they were and how easy it was for her to forget how much of her life was wrapped up in Tony. They were two halves of a whole, according to a lot of people.

"Apparently, this Willow is from the future. A grim one, it would appear."

"What?" she hissed.

Wanda grabbed his hand as she at down next to them both.

"I, well, they sent me here because we don't know how to save you guys. So, I was thinking if we, like, made a plan we could get you guys outta there without Thanos finding out."

They were both quiet now and Willow didn't like it. She couldn't stay here, but she knew they deserved to give it some thought. This could be the last time she saw her friends alive too. She didn't want to spend this moment being worried, but she couldn't shake it either.

Coupled with the fact that they both probably had no idea what the hell she was talking about, she should have counted on this taking a minute.

"Say something," she finally begged. 

"I don't want to be without Vision," Wanda admitted. 

"It's the same for me, I'm afraid. If you can't save us both, then I would rather leave the future as is."

"Then let's make a plan to save you both. Please."

"How do we die?" Wanda asked. 

"Thanos."

"Are we together?"

"I, uh, think so. Why does that matter?"

"We should leave it. You wouldn't be here if it was easy, which means you shouldn't save us."

"She's saved others," Vision corrected. 

"What happens if you just go to the future, our future, and save us there. Why come back here at all?"

"I didn't--I can't. If Thanos sees me or what I'm doing, he'll just change it somehow. Make it worse probably."

The both cinched their eyebrows, still confused obviously. She hated that she wasn't making any sense. And now her thoughts were starting to get fuzzy around the edges. She wasn't sure how much longer she could hold this.

After 45 more minutes, she wasn't the least bit happy with the conclusion. They had spoken their truth, though, and she had no choice but to respect it. They were in love and they wanted to spend what time they had left and fight as hard as they could. but if they didn't make it, they wanted Willow to know it wasn't her fault. She didn't agree with their assessment at all. It wasn't her choice, though.

She was swaying on the spot as Wanda and Vision walked back to their hotel. She hardly needed to concentrate as the rubber band snapped and she was jerked to the present.

She couldn't keep her eyes open, but she could feel Bucky around her as the blackness finally closed in. 

* * *

Bucky paced in front of the art gallery's door as he waited for Willow to reappear. She never came back inside the compound, but he couldn't wait next to Tony and another damn screen again.

"Are you gonna tell me what's going on with you?" Steve asked. 

"Don't know what you mean."

"It's like that, huh?"

Bucky huffed loudly and looked over at his friend, but didn't stop pacing. "What do you want to hear? Why don't you just tell me what you wanna hear and we can skip to that."

"You could start by telling me what's going on between you and Willow," he offered. 

"Nothing's going on."

"You're happy."

"And that's a problem?"

"No. Not at all. I just... don't get it."

"I don't get it either," he groaned. "I just want to be around her. I want to protect her. I wanna make sure she's always smiling."

"Wow," Steve interrupted. "You got it bad."

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know her at all. Tony's right."

"Let's not tell him that," Steve joked. 

Bucky scoffed. "You think it's weird. Everyone does. I get it. We met and we haven't spent an hour apart."

"You've both had weird stuff happen, man," Steve shrugged, leaning against the wall. "You like each other, right? Just let it ride. You're both adults."

"She's actually older than you," Sam chimed in out of nowhere. "She's like 45."

"46," Tony called from the other room.

"46, right. And you're like, what? 26, 27, maybe."

"101, actually."

"Not really. You were frozen most of that. I'll give you 25, but that's it."

"What's your point?" he begged.

"She wants a boy toy. Just go with it, man."

"Oh my God. Stop, both of you," Nat finally interjected. "Leave him alone."

"Yes, please," Tony pouted. "I'm sick of talking about this already. Let's just wait for Willow in silence."

Bucky smirked at the way this was irritating Tony. It was too easy lately and way too much fun. It was almost like he was jealous, but that couldn't be it. Tony had Pepper, but maybe jealousy didn't have to make sense.

He flopped down in the nearest chair, but stood right back up. He didn't know why he thought he could sit still. Bucky needed Willow back for something like that. She calmed him and without her he felt frayed and exposed.

He went to stand next to Steve finally and let his head hit the wall. His started to tap his feet, the movement almost soothing. He followed the grooves in the wood in front of him, running his finger along with the grain. He just had to keep his brain busy and then he wouldn't have to think about the fact that she was gone.

He pushed off the wall after a second and went back to pacing. The minute he passed the gallery door again, Willow was in his arms. She was back. He let out a long breath as he scooped her up fully. That's when he noticed she was limp. Her eyes were rolled in the back of her head and her mouth was slack. Steve sprang into action first, calling for help.

Everyone came rushing to his side, Tony pushing his way to the front. He pulled Willow's wrist up and they all waited for the news. He nodded and picked her up, carrying her off to the lab and away from Bucky. Or he tried to.

Bucky didn't let go of her hand, even when he was being forced to stand right shoulder to shoulder with Tony. They were both uncomfortable with the proximity and neither man moved to change it. They were there for Willow and right now, at this moment, they had an understanding.

"She's breathing," Tony relayed to Wong as he laid her out on the nearest table. 

He kept trying to swat Bucky's hand away as they attached different leads to her chest and head. He wouldn't move and Tony was getting mad. Pepper gave him a look after a particularly hard slap, but Bucky didn't react. His commitment to Willow, or whatever you wanted to call it, was comforting. Or obnoxious. Mostly obnoxious.

"What's wrong?" Bucky finally asked. 

"Well, as you can see, she's not waking up," Tony snapped at him.

"Yep. I can see that. Why? Aren't you supposed to be a genius or something?"

Tony bit the inside of his cheek to keep from spewing terrible things at him, though he had every right. It wouldn't help him save Willow, or wake her up, so it didn't matter what was going on between them. And it didn't matter what was going on between Bucky and Willow either. Tony was there to bring her back. Bucky was right, he was a genius, and this was his responsibility.  _She_  was his responsibility. 


	12. Sugar Coated Accident

Steve stood by the back door as Thor, Bruce, and Scott Lang walked off the airplane together. Thor had a huge smile on his face, which was his usual look when they found someone new, but Steve wondered how long that would last when he found out about Willow's condition.

It'd been two days and she hadn't woken up. Bucky hadn't moved either, of course, except to shower and those were taken in record time. Steve tried to crack a joke about having learned that particular skill in the military, but it fell on deaf ears. It was like he'd taken a vow of silence. If Willow couldn't talk, Bucky wouldn't either. Not that Steve knew if that was true or not, because his best friend hadn't talk to him in two days.

"Hey, guys," he said, pulling Bruce in for a quick hug. "How'd it go?"

"Good. Good. Why are we being so quiet?"

Steve hadn't even stopped to think how strange it might be that they'd all lowered their volume. Even Nathaniel wasn't crying as much. It was more out of respect for Willow, but it was still unintentional on all their parts.

"What's going on?" Thor asked next, his whisper louder than most. 

"Willow came back a couple of days ago and--and she hasn't woken up yet."

Everyone's eyes grew wide. "Who's Willow?" Scott asked after a minute.

Steve gave the other two a look and Bruce held up his hands. "We were trying to find people. We didn't exactly have time to tell him about Tony's time-traveling bestie."

"She can time travel?" Scott asked. "That's  _awesome_." 

"Yeah. Yeah, it is." 

They all stood there awkwardly before Bruce felt obligated to break up the silence surrounding them.

"Well, we're gonna go shower."

Steve showed Scott where he could throw his stuff before he made his way back to the makeshift hospital they'd created in Tony's office. There was still, and would always be, plenty of room left the way this place was designed.

When he got back, everyone was still in the exact same positions. Carol was leaning against the wall, staring down at Willow and watching Bucky. Tony was on her other side, Pepper in his lap. Wong was at the computer, randomly pushing buttons for something to do.

Bucky had his head on top of their hands as he stared up at her. He could have been in the only one in the room and he wouldn't have even known it. There was nothing else and no one that existed for him right now except her.

Steve forced a smile to Carol as he came around the corner, the same fake one she gave back to him. Without Willow awake, no one was really trying all that hard. He stood next to her, but didn't say anything. The Danvers women had a habit of hiding their feelings when things got really bad and Steve knew when she finally let herself go there she'd need someone who could take it.

Bucky reached up and and moved Willow's hair out of her face, letting his hand linger on her cheek for a second.

"Calm down there, Buck. She's asleep. She doesn't know about your little vigil, okay? No need to show off for us."

Pepper rolled her eyes and stood up, walking over to Wong. She hated their ongoing disagreement more than anyone else in the house. Just as Steve had assumed, the minute Tony started talking Bucky seemed surprised to see him there. Almost like he'd forgotten it wasn't just him.

"You can leave," Tony kept up. "Anytime, man. She doesn't need you here."

"And she needs you?" Bucky asked. 

Steve's eyes grew wide at the comment. He hadn't spoken in two whole days and he chose to say  _that_? Steve pushed off the wall, ready to step in again if needed.

"She needs me a hella lot more than she needs you, asshole. It can't be safe for her to sleep next to you. Does she know how dangerous you are?"

Carol rubbed her hands over her face in frustration before walking out of the room.

"You're not a saint, Stark."

"Yeah, well, I've never killed anyone's parents," he blurted out. 

"Just almost Pepper that one time, huh? Or I guess that doesn't count since it was just your suit."

Tony started to breathe heavier as he looked to Steve and all he could do was bow his head. He shouldn't have told Bucky that. He shouldn't have told anyone. Tony had revealed a secret in confidence and clearly only to him.

"That's enough," Willow croaked quietly. 

Bucky and Tony were hovering over her in the next second. Pepper gave Wong a big hug and an uneasy laugh as she watched her friend closely.

Willow groaned loudly and forced both men to back out of her personal space. Bucky sat back down in his chair, never letting go of her hand. Steve was pretty sure they were glued together at this point.

"Can you two stop fighting, please?" she begged. 

"He started it," Tony joked. 

"No. You did. And you know it."

"How do you feel?" he asked, clearly trying to change the subject. 

"Like shit. My head is killing me. I've been listening to you try and get a rise of out James for two days."

"You heard us?" Wong asked, mystified. 

"Yes, I could hear you all. Just couldn't tell anyone to shut up."

Tony laughed and placed a quick kiss on her temple before going over all the leads to make sure they were secure. Of course, he would use this time to run tests. Willow didn't blame him for that part. He would need all that information to stop this kind of thing from happening to her again. What she did blame him for, though, was the way he'd talked down to Bucky since Willow had saved him.

"Are you ever gonna get over this?" 

"Nope."

"Tony..."

"No, Willow. I will never get over the fact that he killed my parents, okay? Never. I'm sure he didn't tell you that shit. And I'm sorry I had to, but he's not safe. And I don't like you around him. I don't wanna lose you."

Willow stared into his eyes before sitting up straighter, cringing at the pain the whole way. "Of course I knew that." Tony's mouth fell open, but she kept going. "Of course he told me. But you didn't say that to save me. You said that to hurt me."

"I didn't..."

"Yes, you did," she interrupted again. "You said that in hopes that I would look disgusted with him and push him away. You did that to hurt us. Both of us. Because that's how it works now."

"You don't know him," Tony groaned. "Why is that how it works now? You guys meet and fall in love in the first act? This isn't a rom-com, Will. You do not know him." 

"I know him enough."

Tony shook his head. "Great. Somehow I turned into the adult in this relationship and you into a lovesick teenager. All downhill from here. I know him enough? What kind of shit is that?"

"I don't know," she admitted. "I don't understand it, but this is happening. Get over yourself."

"What exactly is happening, by the way? Are you guys fuckin' or something?" 

"I trust him," she said, ignoring his crude question. 

Tony stared at the pair for a second before pushing away from the bed hard and walking out of the room. Pepper took a breath and followed after him, but Tony was Tony. She blew a kiss to Willow as she walked out. Tony needed Pepper more than Willow needed her friend, which is why she couldn't be mad. She knew how it worked.

"How do you feel?" Bucky asked again. 

She smiled down at him. "I'm okay."

"You scared the shit outta me," Carol admitted. No one even realizing she'd made it back in the room during all the commotion. "Don't do that again, okay?"

And then she was gone again, Willow watching her dart out the door. She motioned for Steve to follow her, but he was already on her heels. Willow was happy she had someone like Steve to talk to. She wouldn't admit it, but she felt guilty for being gone and Willow knew that.

"Are you okay?" she asked Bucky this time, running a hand through his hair. 

He pulled it to his mouth and kissed her palm. "Yeah, of course."

"Liar," she teased quietly. 

"Don't do that again," he said, echoing Carol's words. "Ever."

"Okay." 

* * *

Willow's laughter bounced off every surface in their room as Bucky looked on, personally offended by the movie they were watching together. He smiled after a second, unable to stop himself from laughing too. Her attitude always affected him in the most delightful ways. He couldn't control anything when she was around him.

"Can we be done with this series?" he whined. 

"Yes, fine," she conceded. "But they are really good."

"The special effects are kinda..."

"You're just spoiled. You got to skip all the really terrible CGI. If you can even call it that."

"Yeah, for the first time I'm glad I was frozen." 

She stopped in her tracks, realization about what he just said hitting her, and then she shook her head. She let out a giggle before going after the remote laying abandoned on the couch.

"Yeah, lucky bastard."

He chuckled too as he rolled to his side, watching her tidy up things. The room wasn't dirty at all, but he knew Willow liked everything in its place. He knew the discarded board games and piles of records were probably driving her crazy. The fact that she'd waited this long to clean up was pretty remarkable. He realized he was watching just a little too closely when he started to admire the curve of her hips and he moved a pillow to strategically cover himself before she noticed.

God, he wasn't enjoying  _this_  effect, especially when he knew he couldn't do anything about it. That's not what their relationship was. Granted, he didn't have a word for it, but it wasn't sexual in the slightest. He wasn't about to cross that line with her and risk losing whatever this was. Nothing was worth that.

"What do you wanna watch next?"

"Umm, nap?" he asked, hopeful. 

"God, you're so old. It's only 3."

"We could go make lunch," he offered. 

"We could. Are you hungry?'

"Always."

"Then lunch first. And then a nap."

He moaned in the back of his throat. "Ugh, yes. That sounds perfect."

She darted out of the room without another word and down the hall, a smirk crossing his face. He hopped up and chased close behind. He could have easily caught her, but their cat and mouse game was his favorite. And she knew it.

She ran to the other side of the island of what had become their kitchen. No one dared to come back to their wing of the compound anymore. Neither of them wanted to admit it, but they basically lived together at this point.

"You can't hide forever," he growled. 

She perked her eyebrows at him as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her flush with his body. He gave her nose a quick kiss before he went to the fridge and left her standing there like she always did. Any sort of physical contact with him left her buzzing from head to toe.

He riffled through the fridge for a second before he came back with a weird look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

"We need to raid Tony's fridge. We ate all the food back here."

She held out her hand. "Let's go."

"Super stealth mission?" he asked as they hid behind a corner. 

"Yep," she whispered, putting a finger to her lips. "And if you get caught behind enemy lines, you better hope Steve wants to save you again."

"You wouldn't come back for me?" he asked, appearing wounded. 

"No way. I'm starving now too."

They came up with their plan easily. Willow would distract everyone while Bucky would go fo the food, grabbing anything he could.

She walked out casually, too casually, and fell down on the couch between Steve and Clint. Both men gave her a funny look, but otherwise ignored her strange behavior.

She kept an eye on Pepper and Tony in the lab, making goo-goo eyes at each other and not working, as she played with Nathaniel. She could hear the fridge door open and she smiled wide, making Steve smile too when he caught on.

"Willow?" Thor said, behind her suddenly. "Can I speak with you?"

"Of course," she answered loudly, making sure Bucky could hear her. "I'll just go over here. To this empty office."

"All right," Thor answered slowly. 

He shut the door behind both of them as Willow propped Nathaniel up on her hip and then moved until she could see Bucky again. She kept giggling every time he would drop something or make a face as he concentrated on getting out undetected. Thor seemed to think it was the baby making her laugh and he didn't correct him.

"I wanted to talk to you about Loki," he admitted. "I know everyone is of a different mindset, but he is my brother and I must do whatever I can."

Willow was suddenly focused on the conversation at hand, not realizing at first that this was serious to him. She concentrated as he continued babbling before putting a hand on his arm.

"I agree with you."

"You do?" 

"Yes, I was already going to save Loki. I didn't even know he wasn't on the list until yesterday. I tried to talk to Steve and Tony about it, but..."

"They don't agree with you," he finished for her. 

"Right, but it doesn't matter. I'm the one going on these trips. I get the final say in who gets saved."

"I feel it only fair to tell you the kind of person he was. I think..." 

"Everyone deserves a second chance, Thor."

"Thank you," he laughed. "Thank you so much."

"We should probably keep this between us for a little while, okay? I don't want them trying to stop us."

"Of course," he answered, still smiling wide. "You're a remarkable woman, Willow Danvers. James Buchanan is very lucky."

She could feel her cheeks get hot at the comment. "Thanks, Thor. Can you, umm, take Nate back to Clint? I'm going to go and take a nap in my room."

"Yes, of course. Come with me, tiniest Avenger," he said, holding his arms out. 

As they walked out of the random conference room she made sure to stand between Bucky and everyone else as he rushed past. He broke out in a run and then started laughing hysterically when it was just them again, both collapsing into a fit of laughter on the couch.

It died down after a second and then they were both just staring at each other like idiots. It happened a lot lately, but one or both of them stopped it before it went anywhere. They always seemed to tiptoe along the line of friends and more than friends. Neither of them sure where the other wanted to take it and both convinced they weren't good enough.

"Wanna start lunch?" Willow asked abruptly. 

Bucky nodded and wiggled free, pulling her up too. She kept her arms around his middle as they walked to the kitchen awkwardly, but it wasn't like he minded.

"Why were you talking to Thor?" 

He tried to ask it like he didn't care one way or the other, but he wasn't sure it was coming off like he meant for it to.

"Are you jealous,  _Bucky_?"

"Ew. Don't call me that."

"Everyone calls you that," she reminded him. 

"Not you." 

"Fine. Are you jealous, James?"

"No. Should I be?"

"Definitely. It's Thor." He stopped working and turned to look at her. She was grinning from ear-to-ear. "I did have a crush on him for a little while."

"Really?"

"Does it matter?"

"No. Just curious."

"Uh huh. Well, in that case, we talked about Loki," she admitted. 

"Oh," he shrugged. "Okay."

He went back to grabbing all the ingredients without another word on the subject. She wasn't sure if she had meant to make him jealous, but he was. He didn't want to fess up, and that was fine. But he was definitely jealous. She'd be jealous too if she paid enough attention to the way he flirted with Natasha, but she made a point not to do that.

"Can I help?" she asked, leaning over the counter.

"Do you know how to make Sausage Scrapple?"

"I have no idea what that is."

He pointed to her normal seat, on the other side of the island, and she obeyed without a word. She propped her head up on her palm and watched him work. He didn't seem to mind when she did it either, but the minute anyone else looked at him for too long he got nervous. Nothing about her made him that kind of nervous. It was only trust between either of them with neither knowing how it was established.

"You're cute," she said dreamily. 

He blushed. "You're perfect."

"Hardly."

He grinned. "I love you."

It just fell past his lips, like he'd said it a thousand times and it made all the sense in the world. But the minute he did, her whole body froze. She was statue. He dropped everything and darted around the island between them.

"I'm so, so, so, sorry. I don't know why I just blurted it out like that. I'm an idiot."

"It's okay," she lied. "It's just--just no one's told me that since..."

"Since your husband died," he completed for her. 

It felt like his heart was in a vice grip as he said the words. Sure, he'd had other people before her, but it was never serious. She'd been  _married_  before him. She'd been  _in love_  before he came along. And if her husband hadn't passed away, she wouldn't be standing in his arms right now.

That thought had occurred to Bucky a couple of times before and it sent him into a tailspin. He hated to think of her with another man, but there'd been one. And he couldn't ignore it.

He put his chin on top of her head and waited for her to calm down. She didn't pull away. That was something he could be thankful for. She hadn't said it back, sure. But she wasn't running away either.  _Progress_ , he thought.

When she did finally move back to see his face, she placed a chaste kiss on his lips before she sat back down. He tried not to let it bother him too much either as he went back to making lunch.

They stayed clear of the topic as the afternoon wore on. Lunch ended up being a quiet, but surprisingly comfortable affair and he couldn't help but grin at her from across the table. 


	13. To Each Their Massacre

Bucky walked with Willow all the way to the art gallery again, refusing to let her go even when it was time. She reached out and touched his cheek with her free hand and he leaned into it.

"I'll be right back."

"Maybe you should wait."

"I've been here two weeks already. It's Peter's turn, James."

"Be careful."

"Always am."

She stood on her tiptoes and captured his lips with her own. After the shock wore off, he was moving along with her, moaning quietly. He desperately hoped this wasn't her version of goodbye.

Steve coughed behind them to get their attention and to let them know they had an audience, but Willow didn't stop or even slow down. Bucky smirked against her lips and she laughed before putting her feet flat on the floor again.

Tony stood awkwardly off to the side, waiting for Willow and ignoring what had just happened. It was what he did most days regarding Willow and Bucky together, which they always were. She knew he thought it would have run its course by now and things would be back to normal, but that wasn't going to happen this time. This was different. For both of them. He'd come around to the idea eventually. Or she could go with her original plan and bring back the two people who could make this better. Right now, she needed to get Peter Parker back where he belonged. She would deal with the rest later.

"Be nice to him," she commanded Tony. 

It was his turn to smirk now and he nodded, which was better than she thought she was going to get. She scrunched up her nose and leaned in to give him a hug. When it was time, though, he didn't want to let go either. She pushed back softly, not trying all that hard, until he let his arms fall.

"I'll be right back," she repeated. 

Tony seemed as comfortable with this as Bucky. They wouldn't admit it, but they had a lot in common. First and foremost, obviously being their personalities. Second, well, the second wasn't something she was ready to admit to herself just yet.

She shut the door behind her and went to stand next to Carol, who was already waiting for her inside. They hadn't spent hardly any time with each other since the last trip and Willow knew exactly what her sister was doing. They both did it when things got hard. She was distancing herself in case things went to shit.

She gave Carol a smile and let their fingertips brush as she was yanked back to the past. The air instantly thinner in this place, but not unbearable. She could breathe. She focused on that as she opened her eyes next.

It was red. Dirt was everywhere. She started to take stock of her surroundings to keep her anxiety attack at bay, naming off what she could see. Tony, Quill, Dr. Strange. A wrecked spaceship. She perked her eyebrows at the last one. They really  _had_  destroyed that thing.

She looked up and saw Peter above her head and then saw Thanos appear as if out of thin air. And she hid, like all the other times. She had to stay out of sight and away from Tony, who always had a knack of being able to find her. Even now, as she hid behind the nearest ruin, she could see him right behind her. He was looking for her. Just this once, she hated how in tune with each other they were.

She closed her eyes and waited for what was going to happen next. It would take Tony to the other end of the killing field. Right now, though, she had about 10 seconds to get to where she needed to be and she didn't hesitate in sprinting to make it in time.

She could feel herself slipping as she dodged things getting thrown at her from all sides. The edges of this world were getting blurry, just like they did when he spent too long with Vision and Wanda. But she hadn't been here long enough for that. Something wasn't right.

She forced herself to be present, make her body stay put as she watched Peter fly past her. She reached out and grabbed his hand without waiting for him to protest and let the rubber band snap them both back where they belonged. She felt herself going under again as the space gave way to something much harder.

"I got him," she whispered and let Peter's hand fall from her grasp.

* * *

 

Bucky was pulling faces at Nathaniel as he sat in his bouncer when Willow fell, literally fell out of nowhere, into his lap. She whispered something he couldn't understand and then she was gone.

_Not again. Goddamnit, not again._

He shook her lifeless body. "Tony," he screamed. "Help. Help me."

Then everyone was surrounding them and someone else was there Bucky hadn't noticed at first. He never noticed anyone else when she was there. But usually she wasn't dying in his arms either. 

Tony picked her up and carried her off. They already had everything set up, just waiting for this exact moment and he hated it. He shouldn't have let her go.

_Like I could stop her._

But he should have. There was no excusing this. He was there to protect her. He could see that now. This was his purpose and he'd failed. Steve put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed as Wong put the paddles over Willow's chest and ordered everyone away.

Her tiny body jerked wildly as they pumped electricity through her over and over again. He didn't care that he was crying now. He couldn't watch her die. Not like this.

_Just let her live. Please let her live. I'll do anything._

He had no idea who he was begging, but it didn't matter as long as someone heard him.

The monitor sprang to life and he cried harder. Harder than he thought possible. He rushed to her side and grabbed her hand, pushing Wong and Pepper out of the way. For once, Tony's smart ass remarks were nonexistent.

_Open your eyes, Willow._

Someone answered his silent pleas again as she started to look around for him. Or he hoped that's who she was looking for. She smiled up at him and patted his cheek again, just like she'd done before she left. She was here. She was back...

"Umm, Mr. Stark?" Peter asked hesitantly. 

Tony laughed loudly and crossed the room and wrapped him up in a hug. Peter looked thoroughly confused before he recovered and hugged him back. Then the wave hit him. The same wave that had hit everyone else she'd saved. He doubled over in pain, but Tony didn't let him go as they all waited for it to pass.

"That was weird," Peter finally panted. "Where are we?"

Tony laughed again and shook his head. "The future, kid."

Peter shrugged his shoulders and looked around at everyone's faces as they all focused back on Willow on the table.

"Can, uh, I have my shirt back?" she asked. Tony held it up, ripped to shreds. "Did you give it to Bruce?"

"Oh, ha ha," he said from the doorway. 

She laughed and then coughed, a different kind of pain hitting her. Most of them filed quickly out of the room to give her some privacy.

Pepper rushed off to grab something for her to wear, Tony hot on her heels. He had gotten really good at ignoring them when they were together and sometimes that just meant leaving. That and seeing his best friend in just her bra wasn't exactly the highlight of his life. A little awkward more than anything.

"You're not leaving again," Bucky commanded, his voice stern. "Ever."

"James..."

"Nope."

"We'll talk about this later."

"You can talk until you're blue in the face. You're not leaving me."

She closed her mouth and looked at him for a second. Just as she was working up the nerve to say something again, Carol burst through the door.

"What the fuck?" she yelled. "You can't leave again."

"Carol. Enough."

"No, you enough. We're not doing this with you again."

She was gesturing between herself and James and Willow perked an eyebrow at the act. The words were the same. The anger and disbelief was the same. James loved her, whether she was ready for it or not.

"I'm serious. Give me that look all you want."

She shrugged off Steve's hand as he walked in too.

"You died," Bucky said. "You died. For a second, you were gone. I lost you. We _all_ lost you"

"I'm not having this conversation again," she responded, exasperated.

"Just stop and we'll drop it," Carol offered. 

"This is why I'm here."

"No. It isn't," Bucky retorted. 

"I'm here to help."

"You're here to..."

"To?" she tried to coax the rest of the sentence out of him. 

"To be with me, damnit."

She chuckled at his outburst and then her face softened when his words hit her. "I am with you. All the time. But I never get to save people. I never get to be the hero. I _am_ doing this."

"That's what this is about?" Carol asked, indignant. "Being the hero? God, Willow."

"I'm not trying to do anything stupid. I just want to help people."

"Please stop this."

They stared at each other for a second before Carol hung her head, her hands on her hips. Bucky scooted back in the small chair he was sitting on. They both looked so helpless. Willow hated it for them, but would have hated being helpless herself. They could handle that feeling for a little while longer. Self-preservation wasn't a trait afforded to the supers and now she was one of them. Why couldn't they see that?

"I love you," he whispered. 

"i love you, too."

"Okay."

"Okay?" 

"Yes, okay. Because I don't know what else to say. I'll be here when you get back and I'm not going to keep anything in anymore. Especially if you're not going to stop," he explained and then paused. "Just wait. Wait until Tony figures something out. Just give him some more time. Give  _me_  some more time. Please."

"Fine," she huffed dramatically, trying to make him smile. "I'll wait. Now give me a hug, asshole."

He chuckled loudly and threw himself at her. They were both so screwed now either way, nothing else mattered. 


	14. My Youth is Yours

_Bucky felt her heavy weight in his arms again, momentarily relieved before he realized she wasn't moving. And this time, unlike all those before, no one was there to help him save her._

He jerked awake and felt around in the cold spot that she'd left next to him.

"Willow?" he called out into the darkness. 

"I'm right here," she whispered back. 

He rubbed his eyes and looked over in the direction of her sweet voice. She had the door to the bathroom propped open just enough to read the book in her lap, her glasses low on her nose as she smiled at him

"Come back to bed."

"In a minute. I'm almost done with this chapter."

"Read it over here," he whined. 

"It won't bother you?"

"I'm okay." 

The truth he couldn't speak out loud, of course, was that the light _would_ bother him, but it'd bother him more to have her away from him.

She put the bookmark she was holding in between the pages and folded up the blanket before crawling back under the covers with him. He snuggled up next to her and closed his eyes, hoping the next dream wasn't so terrible.

* * *

 

"Can you guys, like, detached for one second?" Sam complained. 

Willow had her legs slung over Bucky's as they watched a movie together with the rest of the group. For once. She stuck out her tongue at him and then laid her head on Bucky's shoulder.

Steve and Carol laughed from where they were sitting on the other side of the couch. Tony didn't join in because that would ruin his perfectly constructed plan of pretending this relationship didn't exist. He'd gotten really good at that particular trait over the years, and as far as Willow was concerned everything was perfect since he was done being outright hostile.

Willow wasn't sure how long Happy had been asleep though, but Peter seemed to have a pretty good idea. He was throwing popcorn in the direction of his open mouth, but missing gloriously every time. There were several pieces scattered over his shirt and on the chair he was sitting in.

She laughed quietly to herself taking in the scene around her, content for the first time in weeks. There were still plenty of people missing, but she could see the end of the tunnel now.

Nathaniel started to fuss and Willow jumped up to get him, like she always did when she was in the room. She swatted Clint's hand away and he pretended to be hurt as she made her way to the rollaway crib that was always in the room.

She propped him up on her hip, the place he seemed to fit perfectly, and walked around the room. She was bouncing along as she went, just like he was used to, his head against her chest in no time. His little fist was closed around the necklace she'd gotten from Tony when they were teenagers. She couldn't remember a time she'd ever taken it off.

Bucky let his head roll back to look at them after a second or two, smirking at her and holding out her hands for the baby. She swatted him away too before motioning for him to turn around and watch the movie. He pouted for a second before giving in, letting his hand linger on the couch where he could still be touching her in some small way.

* * *

 

Bucky licked his lips as he looked around the chess board for his next move. Willow was leaned back in her chair, looking rather pleased with herself and that always made him nervous. She didn't have a poker face at all, so if she looked happy it was because she was about to win.

Everyone had gathered around them slowly, to watch the massacre. The worst of this being that Bucky had  _just_  introduced her to Dunsany's version of chess about a week ago and now she was regularly kicking his ass.

"You're cute," she whispered in a dreamy tone. 

"Don't fall for it, Buck. She's trying to distract you," Steve coached. 

He moved one piece and then sat back too, watching in awe as her slender fingers picked up one tiny piece and destroyed his whole strategy. He groaned loudly and covered his face.

"How'd you do that?"

"Do what?"

He narrowed his eyes at her. She knew exactly what he was talking about and how many things he could be referring to with that one comment. She was also answering each one. Willow knew how to push his button. Each of them. God, he was in so much trouble. They didn't stop staring at each other, the rest of the world starting to fade away.

"That's our cue," Sam said, darting out of the room. 

He was probably right. It wouldn't be too long before he threw the board across the room and got into another epic tickle fight with her. Sam always made it sexual, but it wasn't like that with them. Somehow, though, it was more intimate. He knew her better without the sex. He loved her without it. Not that he'd say no.

* * *

 

"Did... did you, uh, do the laundry?" Willow stuttered. 

"Yeah," he answered before wrapping his arms around her from behind. "Why?"

"You saw my underwear."

She could feel the heat creep up her neck as he laid his head on her shoulder and started to laugh loudly. "So..."

"I, uh, I don't know. I just..."

"You have nice underwear," he interrupted. 

Now her whole body was red. He had seen her underwear and he thought it was nice. Did that mean he wanted to see more of her underwear? Did that mean he wanted to see her without it? Why was she having this conversation with herself? They didn't have a sexual relationship, and probably never would. It was better this way. She couldn't get hurt if she didn't fall in love with him. 

"You okay?"

"Yea--yeah. I'm fine."

"Liar," he teased. "Come to bed so we can talk more about your underwear."

"Oh my God, stop." 

He laughed louder, clutching his chest. "You should see your face."

She picked up the nearest pillow and threw it at him, hitting him square in the face. "You're the worst."

He didn't stop laughing as he pulled her down to the bed with him, or when he pulled her hands away from her face. It did just as he kissed her cheek and pulled her onto his chest before reaching over to turn off the light. She worked on calming down as they fell asleep.

* * *

 

"Willow?"

Her spot was cold again. He looked over to the left and saw she wasn't on the couch either. He furrowed his brows and sat up on his elbows to look around more fully. It was completely dark. There was no light coming from under the bathroom door either.

He got up and poked his head out and heard nothing. No one was up. He felt around in the room for a shirt before pulling it over his head and walking out into the hallway. Willow didn't care if he was shirtless, but he was sure Sam, or even Steve, would have a comment.

Bucky couldn't tell what time it was, but it had to be late if even Tony was asleep. He looked in his lab anyway and noticed there was one light on. Maybe he'd fallen asleep in there after all. He peered around the corner, not wanting to start a fight and noticed it was Wong, not Tony. And he had the paddles in his hands.

He opened the door slowly. "You okay?"

"Mr. Barnes, how are you?" he greeted, not looking up from his hands. 

"What's going on?"

"I'm waiting for Willow," he stated plainly. 

"Where is she? Where'd she go?"

"She left, Mr. Barnes. I'm not sure where. Or when."

"Like left, left? Why? She.... she told me, uh..."

He was on the verge of hyperventilating as Wong finished his sentence for him. "Was going to wait? Yes, she told me the same thing. But she left approximately 5 minutes ago."

"How do you know?"

"I can feel her," he explained. "It's especially powerful when she leaves her own time period. It woke me up."

"Gotcha."

He sat down hard in the nearest chair and put his head in his hands. Something he did quite frequently now that he was in Willow's life. She seemed to make unilateral decisions about both of their futures all the time. He hated how wrapped up in her he was. He hated losing control to anyone and it'd been so effortless with them.

"She's coming back," Wong announced suddenly. "Any moment. And she is not alone."

Well, at least she did what she wanted and saved someone else. He just hoped that damned dream he kept having wasn't about to come true. Wong was here, so already it was different, he reminded himself.

He could hear her laughter before he saw her. She wasn't hurt, it seemed. That was good. Maybe she didn't go far. Maybe that's what made it worse. Then he heard a man's voice next; one he thought he recognized.

"Shit," she whispered. 

She knew he was up now too and she'd guessed he wouldn't be happy. How right she was. 

"Howard. Maria. Let's go talk in here. I'll wake up Tony, okay?" 

"Okay, dear."

Bucky's mouth fell open. She had saved Howard and Maria Stark? She brought them back. He looked over at Wong and saw something strange flash across the other man's face. It was like he was angry, but Bucky couldn't tell at who it was directed. He didn't have time to process that either as they filed in. Willow wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Are you all right?" Wong asked. 

She nodded. "Just gonna go wake up Tony."

"How long?" Howard asked, stopping her as she walked past them. "How long have we been gone?"

"I'm... 45," she said slowly. 

"Tony is 47?" 

"She doesn't look any older," Maria whispered as Willow hurried away. 

Bucky didn't know what to do, stuck in a room with the two people he'd killed in another time line. It'd been violent and awful from what he remembered seeing.

"Sergeant Barnes," Howard said jovially, noticing he was there. "How are you?"

"Uh, good." 

"It's nice to finally meet you," Maria offered. 

"Did, uh, Willow not tell you?" 

"What you did?" Howard asked. "Yes, she did. She also explained the situation." 

Bucky's eyes grew large. Maybe she hadn't told it right. There was just no possible explanation for Howard Stark calming discussing his own death.

He rubbed his finger over his bottom lip a couple of times as he thought of the least rude way to escape this incredibly awkward situation. Then he could hear Tony running toward them.

"Mom?" he shrieked when he saw her. 

"Sweetheart," she cried. 

He barreled through the glass doors quickly and found himself in front of his mom after years apart. He couldn't wipe the smile off his own face as she took stock of the much older Tony than the one she'd just seen.

"Look at your face--wait, what is this?" she asked, noticing the glowing shape underneath his shirt. 

"Not important, Ma."

"Willow told us a bit, but I still don't feel like I know what's going on."

"Sit down. I'll tell you everything, but first. Mom, Dad, this is Pepper Potts." 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a comment whore. Please leave me something to geek out about. 
> 
> xoxo, GalaxyCollector


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